Me: (as Matthew is picking up the fruit bowl for a second serving) Uh, make sure you leave enough for Josh to have some. Matthew: (groaning) But he isn't here. Me: Leave enough for Josh. Matthew: He doesn't even have to know we had any. Me: Matthew, if you were the one at work and Josh was going for the rest of the fruit, wouldn't you want me to stick up for you? Brian: Yeah, Matthew. What would Jesus do? Matthew: (shrugging) Make more fruit?