Late-40s Wisdom

I couldn't help myself.
Matthew came into the house bemoaning the fact that he'd forgotten to stop by the tire store to get his tire pressure checked. "I was going to do it," he said, "but I drove right by. Forgot all about it!"
And I really understood his pain. Because my very-less-than-stellar memory often sees me forgetting to do the things I was sure I'd remember to do.
Often.
Waaaaay too often.
Which is why I was so eager to share my hard-earned wisdom with my son.
I said, "I've learned a strategy to remember when I need to do something out of the ordinary. It really helps. I do something out of the ordinary right away, which I'll see later. So when I see it later I'll remember there was something I needed to do, and I do it!"
For example, Monday I needed to stop by the bread store after I got groceries.
I wrote that need on my grocery list, but I knew by the time I put the groceries on the belt, paid for everything, got out of the store and had my bags loaded into the van - I would not be thinking about that one remaining item on my list. Sooooo, when I was getting out of the van to go into the store - when I picked up the list and saw "bread store" on it, I thought, Aha! Time to use my memory strategy!
I reached down, picked up the snow brush, and placed it on my seat as I got out.
Because when I finished shopping and put the groceries in the back of the van, then came around to get in and go home - well, I'd have to move the brush out of my way.
Which would be unusual.
Which would cause me to wonder why I had put it there.
Which would remind me that I needed to do something out of the ordinary.
Which would cause me to recall that unusual thing.
Which - of course - was: go to the bread store!
So I went, and *Voila!* now my guys have yummy bread to eat with dinner.

Truth be told, I am not sure how inspiring my tale of wisdom was for Matthew.
I mean, I really hope he tries my strategy and finds it helpful.
But I realize he may think it's silly, and he may never benefit from utilize my idea.
And that's his loss okay, I guess. At least I tried to help him!
Just, please, do me one favor: If you ever pass by my van and see the snow brush on the driver's seat, don't put it away for me. Chances are there's something out of the ordinary I'm trying to remember! *grin*

How to Fold a Fitted Sheet

So, I was planning to edit out the first thirty-or-so seconds of this video, but decided to leave it in for fun. *wink*
The back-story is: on the first take of this post my video guy (aka, my husband) "took" a picture - rather than recording a video. And just before we started the second take I said something funny about his technical know-how and, well, I had a hard time controlling my laughter.

Dear Elizabeth

I sat down a couple nights ago and wrote to Elizabeth.

Actually, I've been writing to her for over 18 years now.
Sometimes weeks or months pass between entries, but I started a journal for her when I learned I was pregnant and it has become one of my joys.
Initially, I thought when she was a teenager I would write things like,

We had such and such conflict and this is what I did, and this is why. Hoping now that you're older you'll understand. ((hugs))

But I have found quite a different sort of thing happening.
*Sometimes I write about a struggle I've had and shared how God has been faithful.
*Other times I re-tell a conversation Elizabeth and I shared about an issue she's facing, and I try to speak more words of encouragement.
*Most recently I wrote out a prayer for her.

More and more, I am being filled with joy at the thought of God using these things I'm writing to speak Truth to Elizabeth and encourage her heart. Maybe even some day down the road when I am not here anymore.
I wonder, Will she read this one when she's struggling with motherhood? Will it give her hope to know I felt the same way? Will she be able to glimpse God's goodness through my words?

Even as I sit here and write these words, thinking and praying about how God might use them to bless my daughter, I am amazed and humbled by His gracious work in my life. I remember well the days of despair I faced years ago. I recall when I yelled, more often than I spoke. I think of wanting to resign my role as mother because I didn't think I could do it anymore. When "Surviving Motherhood" seemed like an oxymoron to me.
But God has used my darkest days and hardest moments to shape me. HE is transforming me into the woman HE created me to be. And I know - if God can do that work in me, surely He can use my feeble words to bless my daughter. Now, and in the years to come.
Yes, LORD, please make it so!

Cleaning Up Blood

What would you do if your daughter called out in a panic, "Mom, there's blood all over the carpet!"?
When you're sitting on the couch watching a movie with your husband.
If you're like me, you'd moan and stand up while mumbling, "Guess I better go take care of that."

This is a picture of my evening last Friday.

But when I walked over to the beige carpet and saw several spots/smears of blood, my lackadaisical attitude quickly changed to action. I went straight to the hallway closet and grabbed a rag and my bottle of hydrogen peroxide. Then I got down on my knees, poured a small amount of peroxide on each spot, let it fizz, blotted it with the rag, and - poof! - the blood was gone.

Seriously. It was that easy. And there is no trace of the blood on the carpet.

It's a little trick I learned at Cedar Point when I was eleven, or so. I was taking my brother on a ride and the door hit his head - which started to bleed profusely. I picked him up and ran to a first aid station, where we saw some of the blood had gotten on my shirt. And the aide simply blotted it off with peroxide.
That's why when I saw all that blood on the carpet, I decided to give peroxide a try. And it worked. Beautifully.

Soooooo, the next time you have some blood to clean up, grab your peroxide!

BTW, the blood was from one of Elizabeth's friends. She'd cut her foot and didn't even know it until someone saw her tracks on the carpeting. *whatever* LOL

You've Got to Try This!

Will you be gathering together with family and friends over the next couple of weeks to celebrate Christmas and New Years?
Then I know a game you must try!
I don't know what it's called, but I can tell you all about it. Some friends in my small group introduced it to us recently, and I can't remember the last time I laughed so hard. *grin*
Here's what you need:
Gather everyone in a circle and give each person a stack of paper with as many sheets as there are people in the group. The bigger the group, the better! (Needs to be an even number of people, by the way. Though you could make adjustments to work with an odd number...)
To begin, everyone writes two words on the top sheet of paper. A descriptive word (adjective or -ing verb) and a noun. eg. 'crooked finger' or 'crying baby'
Then everyone passes the stack of paper to their right. After reading the two words, everyone puts that paper at the back of their stack and draws a picture corresponding to the words. Pass the stack to the right again, and now everyone looks at the picture, puts the paper at the back of the stack and writes two words that describe the picture they just saw. Pass to the right again, and now everyone draws a picture of the 'new' two words. Keep going - alternating between writing words and drawing pictures - until you've made it all the way around once.

Then the fun really begins. *wink*

Gather the circle in closer and go through each stack, laughing at the progression of words and pictures. It is hilarious to see how the pictures are interpreted and the original words morph.
We did this with all adults in my small group, but will include the kids at Christmas gatherings. I may be looking forward to this game more than I am to the presents. LOL

Chutes and Ladders

When was the last time you played Chutes and Ladders?
If your children are still quite young, it may not have been too long ago that this board game was laying out on the floor waiting to be played. At my house, however, we haven't seen this game in years. So, you can imagine my surprise last week when Elizabeth approached me and asked, "Mom? Do you want to play Chutes and Ladders with me?"
Elizabeth proceeded to lead me outside to show me the 'board' she had drawn on our driveway with sidewalk chalk. There it was - all 100 squares, numbered, with chutes and ladders every which way. She had a dice in her hand, and she was ready to play.
So we began to roll the dice and walk through the game board, when we (read that: Me!) came up with a fun idea.
You know how on the 'real' game board there are pictures of the bad ideas and good ideas associated with the chutes and ladders, and the resulting consequences at the bottom of the chutes and the tops of the ladders? Well, in our version of the game whenever we landed on a space at the bottom of a ladder we made up a scenario of a wise thing we did, climbed the ladder, and told the consequence of our action. And whenever we landed on a space at the top of a chute we made up a scenario of a foolish thing we did, traveled down the chute, and told the consequence of that action. It really was fun!
Before long, Brian came outside and we invited him to join us. So there we were, 39,38, and 14 - playing Chutes and Ladders - for the whole neighborhood to see. *grin*

Do you have some sidewalk chalk at your house? You really should get it out and play this game - no matter how old your kids are!

New Deal Update

Two weeks ago I told you about the New Deal I have instituted in my house. It is my attempt to maintain a tidier, more peaceful environment. And now that the New Deal has been in place for a while, I thought it would be fun to give you an update.
At the present moment, this is the score: Joshua and Matthew have five check marks, and Elizabeth has one. That means Joshua and Matthew each owe me 25 minutes of work and Elizabeth five.

Can I tell you how amazed I am by the wonderful job my kids have done of putting their things away properly???

Elizabeth got her check mark last week, and I think it scared her. When I was taking her to church Wednesday evening she wanted to leave her book in the van so she could read on the way home. But first she asked me, "Will I get a check mark if I leave this here?"
She also wanted to know when I was going to redeem the five minutes she owes me. It was this question of hers which led to my next decision regarding the New Deal. I will "bank" the check marks until a child has accumulated 30 minutes. Then I will come up with a good task and put them to work.
As the kids and I were discussing this redemption plan, it didn't take long for them to figure out that if they never go past five check marks, they'll never have to do the work I'm threatening. Oh, do they ever think they have it good! What they don't realize is, that is exactly what I'm going for.
I didn't come up with this New Deal because I want to get them to do extra work. I did it because I want them to be responsible for their stuff and contribute to keeping our home cleaned up. And if they never go past five check marks, that means my mission has been accomplished!
So, they think they're "winning" by not having to work off those check marks. But I think I'm winning more, because this place is going to be free of messes.
Yes, this is the kind of win-win situation I like!

May the joy of the Lord fill your soul this weekend. And may your children clean up all their messes. *grin*

*****Edited to add: Since the writing of this post, the kids have each earned another check mark. It was one infraction that any of them could have cleaned up and I asked all of them to do. Since no one did (Uh, that "no one" would be ME!) they each got a mark. That puts Joshua and Matthew at 30 minutes, and I have some redeeming to do. Hmmm, I have yark work that needs to be done. Guess who's going to be helping me!!!

Pranks and Cake

For the past week or so, Elizabeth has been teasing me by letting me know she had an April Fool's trick to play on me. I knew Brian was in on it, because he had to get something for her and they were only too happy to talk about it in front of me.
Tuesday night Elizabeth asked me if I was going into Fitness Together to work out Wednesday morning, and when I said, "Yes," she wanted to know when I would be home. I thought she was timing her scheme for sometime in the morning, but Elizabeth said she was just asking because she had a paper I needed to sign before she went to school. Yeah, sure, I thought.
So Wednesday morning when I walked into the house after my workout, I half expected a bucket of water to fall on my head. But nothing fell. And Elizabeth approached me with that paper she needed to have signed. Just like she said. No prank. Hmmmmm.
After school, Elizabeth was just as nice as could be. Nothing unusual about her behavior. We talked for a while and then I left to get the boys. Part of me wondered if the trick was to get me thinking there was going to be a trick, and then to not pull anything on me. You know how I enjoy mind games...It wouldn't surprise me if Elizabeth was playing one with me.
So anyway, I got the boys and we walked home.
This time when I entered the house, Elizabeth was sitting on the couch reading and she asked me if I would cut an orange for her. I said, "You mean you want me to peel it for you?" (This is not an unusual request from my daughter. Though it is one I prefer to shrug off. Honey, you can get your own orange.) But she said, "No. You don't need to peel it. Will you just cut it into quarters for me?"
*Insert begging puppy-dog look.*
What could I do? It was not a big request, so I walked over to the refrigerator and got out an orange for my dear daughter. But when I cut into it, this is what I saw:I have never seen purple mold, and the outside of the orange had looked fine, but I was sure there was something seriously wrong with this piece of fruit, and I squealed, EEEEEWWWWWW!
That's when Elizabeth started laughing, and I knew the joke was on me. She came over to me then and told me this was a Blood Orange and assured me it was fine to eat. We finished cutting it up and ate it together while Elizabeth told me all about the work she put into setting up this little prank.
She's such a doll.

As for dinner, we enjoyed our meatloaf cake. See?When I was finished, I said, "Excuse me. I need to go fix the salads." Joshua said he was too full. I smiled at him and said, "That's OK, honey. You don't need to eat any salad. Just finish your cake." And everyone laughed.

Now I'm wondering what the kids are going to think when I make strawberry shortcake for dinner one night this summer. Really. I heard of some one's grandma doing that and thought it sounded so fun. It can't hurt to do it once! So the next time I make cake for dinner, it will be for real.

Go ahead. Call me crazy.

It's Almost April Fool's Day!

April Fool's Day is next Wednesday. Have you made dinner plans yet???
Every year for the past four or five years I have made the same thing for dinner on April 1. We have "cake" for dinner, and "salad" for dessert.

Really!

OK, not really. C'mon y'all, it's April Fool's Day!

It just looks like cake for dinner and salad for dessert. Really the cake is meat loaf, "frosted" with mashed potatoes. And the dessert is a dressed up ice cream sundae in a waffle bowl that looks like a taco salad.

Here's a picture of last year's cake:
My kids simply love this dinner, and are already asking if I'm going to make it again.

Here's the low-down, if you want to give it a try.
Use your favorite meatloaf recipe and make the loaves in two 8-inch round cake pans. Drain the fat and frost them with mashed potatoes like you would a two-layer cake. I also put mashed potatoes in a pastry bag to pipe on an edge and then add dots of mustard and ketchup to decorate the cake.

For the taco salad dessert, scoop ice cream into waffle bowls and top with shredded coconut which you have colored with green and yellow food coloring (to look like cheese and lettuce), maraschino cherries (cherry tomatoes), sliced licorice (black olives), and whipped topping (sour cream).

I also like to make a yummy looking drink for our April Fool's dinner. For these, prepare two 3-ounce packages of strawberry gelatin as directed and refrigerate until partially set - about 2 hours. Stir in 3/4 cup each fresh strawberries, raspberries and blueberries, and pour into six tall drink or soda glasses. Insert a straw and refrigerate until set.
They look like delicious drinks, but when you pucker up on the straw you discover the trick.

That's the trick I'm playing next week. Let me know if you give it a try!

The New Deal

When our country was in distress from the mess of the Great Depression, President Franklin Delano Roosevelt initiated a sequence of programs intended to clean up the situation and bring relief to the people. He called his programs the New Deal.

As I have been looking around my house I have experienced distress from the mess caused by my children. Sometimes this mess leaves me feeling like I am about to enter my own Great Depression. The clutter gets overwhelming and I want to clean it up, but they come in and drop more clutter, and I begin to think, What's the point of trying to keep this place clean???
Sooooo, I have come up with my own New Deal. Yes, I have created a sequence of programs intended to clean up the situation in this house and bring relief to ME the people.
Here's how it works:
I have posted a chart on the wall with which I will keep track of any time I pick up and put away something which belongs to one of my children. And for each check mark one of my children receives on this chart, they will owe me five minutes of work. Any kind of work I choose.
If I take care of something and I don't know who is the originator of the mess (like a dirty dish left on the coffee table), all three of them will get a check mark!
And when I decide there are enough check marks to redeem, I get to put my child(ren) to work so they can pay me back for taking care of their things.

We have only been doing this for a few days, and I'm telling you - it is working wonderfully. We cleaned the house Sunday to get this program started, and it's still clean!
I love it. My kids don't like to "work" and I am able to capitalize on their dislike of work to get them to take care of their stuff. The thing is, they're working by putting their stuff away, but they think they're getting out of work. I love mind games! *grin*
And this is only Phase One of my New Deal. Phase Two will involve the counter tops in the kitchen. When everyone is good with putting their own stuff away, I am going to institute check marks on the chart for any time I have to wipe someone else's crumbs off the counter. That'll be nice.
And, I am seeing another benefit of my New Deal. Since the kids will be affected by someone else leaving a dish or other item sitting out, I intend to help them see the benefit of taking care of things laying around - even if it isn't "your" thing. Certainly, picking up and rinsing someone else's dish will be less painful than five minutes of labor assigned by Mom!

Yes, I am proud of my New Deal. Looking around at a clutter-free room makes me feel peaceful. And knowing I don't need to nag my kids to get it to stay this way does wonders for my heart!

God Changed My Heart

We just spent the weekend with the Hossink side of the family to celebrate Christmas. It's always nice to be together with all the family, but if I am to be honest (And you know I always am here!) there is one person I look forward to seeing more than anyone else.
That would be my sister-in-law.
She is my age, she's a mom, and she is also my sister-in-Christ. I love spending time with her talking about mom stuff, kid stuff, and how God holds it all together. And as we talked this weekend, God showed me one more thing about my sister-in-law. She's brilliant!

We were talking about the times when our children are asking for something and we are saying, "No." And, at least for the two of us, sometimes the NO is coming selfishly. In those instances - when our children insist on knowing why we're saying NO - we realize our selfish attitude, we're convicted by the Holy Spirit, and we want to change our answer. (OK, we don't want to change our answer. But the Spirit of God has a way of getting us to do what we do not want to do!) My sister-in-law said at those times she tells her daughters they need to thank God for changing Mommy's heart.

And that's when I recognized her brilliance.

I thought about how many times I have struggled with changing my answer in those situations. The realization of my selfishness and my desire to change most often comes in sync with my child pestering me with why's and please's. And I hesitate to change my NO to YES, because I do not - in any way, shape or form - want to reinforce begging. I do not want my children to think if they just pester me long enough about something, I'll give in.
So I am reluctant to change my answer because, if I do, what else are they going to think except that their begging paid off?

Now, thanks to God speaking through my sister-in-law, I know what to do. I just need to tell my children the truth.

"God changed my heart, so I am changing my answer."

And if this new response motivates my children to flood heaven's gates with requests that God change my heart, well, how wonderful would that be??!! *grin*

An Idea for You

If you haven't read this post about the Dream Calendar, please take a look. And leave a comment to win a copy!

Last night, the kids and I had a great time with Jesus.
We sat down to read the Bible and pray before they went to bed and I opened my Bible up to Luke 18 - the story about the blind beggar who received his sight. In this story, a blind man was sitting by the road calling out to Jesus as He walked by. Jesus ordered the man to be brought to Him and asked,

"What do you want me to do for you?"
"Lord, I want to see," he replied.
Jesus said to him, "Receive your sight; your faith has healed you." Immediately he received his sight and followed Jesus, praising God. When all the people saw it, they also praised God.

Luke 18:41-43

I read the story and paused for a minute. Then I asked my children, "If you were sitting by the road and Jesus walked by, and He stopped and asked you, 'What do you want me to do for you?' what would you say to Him?"
I'm telliing you, the conversation that ensued delighted my heart as I got a peek into the hearts of my children. I told them how I would reply to that question, too, and then I prayed - asking Jesus to do those things for us.
And I look forward to praising God with them as we see Him meeting these needs in our lives!

Do you read the Bible with your kids? Let me encourage you to read Luke 18:35-43 together and talk about how each of you would answer Jesus' question. Then pray, and have faith, and praise Him together!

WFMW - Amazing Whites!!!

A few weeks ago I posted a WFMW entry about arm pit stains, and Mary Beth left a comment with a recipe for getting rid of stains.
I'm sure it was not a coincidence (Because I am convinced God is involved in everything. *grin*) that the next day my husband came to me with a badly stained white shirt - yellowed collar, and various other spots - but no arm pit stains. I told him I had a new recipe to try on it, and he gathered a few other "white" shirts for me to clean.
Well, last night I finally got around to it and I am telling you - I am amazed! These shirts look fantastic!!!
So, here's what I did:
I mixed three gallons of HOT water in my kitchen sink with 1-1/2 cups bleach and 1-1/2 cups dishwasher detergent (I tripled the original recipe, because I had several shirts to clean.) and soaked the shirts for about an hour, "stirring" a couple times in that hour. Then I rinsed them and washed as normal. Seriously amazing results!

And that? Works for me.

For more Works For Me Wednesday ideas, please visit Shannon at Rocks in My Dryer.

WFMW - Getting Personal

On this blog, I have held back almost nothing from you. I have shared my failings and frustrations, my insecurities and hang-ups.
But today? Today I am taking it a step further. Yes, today I am going to talk with you about something very personal.

ARMPITS!!!

There. I said it. Now, Karen, move on.
Several weeks ago Shane at Heart Reflections posted a Works For Me Wednesday entry about how to get rid of armpit stains in shirts. I was so interested in this post because it was a question I always wanted to ask, but was too shy to do so.
I hated that my shirts would get armpit stains, but I thought there must be something "wrong" with me which was causing them. So I just quit wearing the shirts that looked bad and tried to avoid raising my arms.
Then I saw Shane's post, and I tried treating several of my shirts with a baking soda paste. But I was so interested in finding a solution to this problem that I kept researching different options, and I came across some information I didn't expcet to find.

The stains in my shirts were not caused by some weird chemical imbalance in my body. They were caused by my antiperspirant! Specifically, by the active ingredient aluminum. I don't know what it is, but something about the aluminum causes the stains.

Whew! What a relief to know it wasn't ME.
Anyway, I went on to do more searching about antiperspirant alternatives and found a wealth of options. For a while I was trying plain rubbing alcohol, but I didn't like that very much. So I looked in the store and found there are a number of deodorants which are not antiperspirants, and therefore do not contain that nasty stain-causing aluminum.
I bought herbal clear natural deodorant, and love the scent of it. However, I noticed it sort of makes my armpits feel sticky, so I also put on baby powder and find myself to be quite comfortable. Depending on my level of activity, I sometimes feel the need to freshen up during the day, but if it will save my shirts from now on - it is so worth it to me.

And there you have it.
Deodorant without antiperspirant, and a little baby powder.
No more armpit stains.
That works for me!
For more great ideas from Works For Me Wednesday, visit Shannon at Rocks in my Dryer.
***Edited to add***
Several people have asked if the baking soda paste worked. Well, I tried it once. Put it on the shirts and let them sit overnight, then washed them as usual, but didn't notice any improvement. The thing is, I read several places that if you have put the stained shirt through the dryer, the stain has been set. So, it's the eternal optimist in me that was giving the baking soda treatment a try in the first place.
I don't know if repeated attempts would take care of it, or not. I kinda doubt it. But I might try anyway! *grin*

E-mailing with Joshua

For at least a year, Joshua had been asking us if he could have an email account. I kept putting him off, telling him he didn't need it and coming up with any excuse I could to avoid the subject. Don't know why I was against it - except that I'm a little slow, remember?
Anyway, a friend of ours told us about an email account especially for kids called Zoobuh. We looked into it, liked it, tried it, and are happily using it now. There are all kinds of safety controls with Zoobuh - my favorite being that Brian gets a copy of every single email Joshua sends or receives.
So we got him all set up and, in spite of my reluctance in the beginning, I absolutely love that Joshua has email. For one, he loves to correspond with my grandma via email. (Yes, my 90-year-old grandmother is a savvy internet user.) She sends him jokes and cute attachments almost every day and he just loves it. He also has fun sending and receiving email with his grandma Hossink.
One day recently, I was remembering that I used to write letters to my grandpa when I was a little girl and I loved getting mail from him. I thought, Gee, wouldn't it be fun if my kids did that with their grandparents? And then I realized that correspondence is happening. A la 2008!

But the thing I love most about Joshua having email is the messages he and I send to each other. Like this one I wrote after we'd had a rough nighttime.

Hi Joshua,

I know you like to get email, so I am hoping you will be willing to read these words carefully.

I told you today it isn’t easy being a mom. I want to be wise and make right decisions in how I am raising you. Sometimes I will make mistakes. I know I won’t always get it right. But I want you to know I will always do my best.
Every decision I make for you, every time I discipline you for something, please know I am trying to do what is best for you. It is NOT my goal to ruin your life or to waste your time by talking to you about your behavior or attitude. I love you, Joshua, and I always want the very best for you.

Love,
Mom

And this was his reply.

YES I READ YOUR MESSAGE CAREFULLY AND I KNOW YOU DONT WANT TO RUIN MY LIFE AND YOU ARE DOING A GOOD JOB I LOVE YOU MORE THAN YOU WILL EVER LOVE ME AND YOU ROCK MORE THAN ME.
LOVE, JOSHUA

OK, he needs to work on punctuation, but I can see his heart even without periods and commas.
The thing is, in the heat of the moment it usually isn't a good time to say the things I really want to say. But when I send an email - since he loves to receive email - he is happy to read what's on my heart. It's a good thing. *grin*
Joshua frequently asks me to send him an email, so I have been typing out lots of memory verses or short testimonies of how God is showing Himself to me. Yes, I am seeing this "modern mode" of communication can be a really good thing. Some may say it's cold and impersonal. I disagree. (Joshua usually takes time to personalize his emails to me in pretty colors!) Besides, it works. We're in the computer age and that's how my son likes to "talk." So I'm going to meet him where he's at.

Mom's Off Duty - The Final Report

Yes, this is the final report. Mom's Off Duty has been cut short by one day. And we're going right into Mom's Having a Party!

Not sure if the kids secretly placed a call to Grandma for help, but she has taken them for a long weekend at her house. (I'm kidding - I know they didn't call her. It's just this weekend was the only time which would work out for her to take them, unless she waited until August. And since you've been reading about how great my kids are, you can understand why she didn't want to wait that long. *grin*)

So I've had a week of no housework, and now I have a long weekend of no one calling me Mom. Yep, hubby and I are going to party. *wink*

But, about today - the final day of Boot Camp for my kids. I'm telling you, I was totally blessed. As they have been all week, they got right into their morning chores - mostly taking care of dishes. And today they also took care of laundry.
That was all great, but it was our afternoon which really pleased me. The work was all done and I suggested taking a walk. Elizabeth and Matthew were interested, (Most likely because I said we could walk to Seven-Eleven and get an ice cream treat. Elizabeth will do anything for ice cream.) but Joshua was not.
I said he could stay home if he wanted but I hoped he would come.
He said if he came, he wanted to bring his DS along to play with while he was walking.
I said, "No deal." I said I hoped he would come along, but he couldn't bring the DS.
We argued it out a bit and I simply said he needed to choose. Joshua, of course, thought I was being unreasonable and didn't understand why he couldn't bring the DS on our walk. I held my ground.
And, boy, was I ever glad.
Joshua decided to come with us, without the DS, and my heart delighted in watching him walk next to Elizabeth all the way to the store. They were talking and laughing and enjoying each other. I saw my two oldest children - who so often fight with each other - having a good time together. As I watched them I prayed for them, asking God to deepen their friendship and grow their love for one another.
I couldn't help but wonder, too, if the things they went through this week - in being responsible for things around the house - may have contributed to improving their relationship. From what I could see, they really did work together well. Sure, there were moments of bickering, times when one would complain that another wasn't helping enough. But over all, I got the sense they were in this thing together.
And I couldn't be happier.
Yes, it was a long and hot walk to the store, and I didn't even get ice cream, but it was the best walk I have taken in a very long time. We made a memory, the kids enjoyed a special treat, and I took tremendous delight in seeing the growing relationships between my kids.

So, this is how I see it:
My kids are able to actively participate in household responsibilities.
Their contribution seems to build their confidence, and they actually appear to enjoy the work. (We've even talked about how we'll continue, and they are agreeable. Not that I would have changed my mind if they didn't agree. LOL)
They are learning to work together.
I have confidence they will love each other when they're grown up, because they're showing signs of it now!

My kids are far from being perfect (just like their mom!!!) but they're wonderful to me. And because of what I have seen in them over the past four days, I am officially declaring my little Mom's Off Duty exercise a success.

Now it's time to party!

Mom's Off Duty - Day Three Report

Today's proverb:

Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.
Proverbs 22:6

This is the reason I am doing what I am doing, and my kids say they "get it." We talked about it this morning - the responsibilities around the house, learning how to be a little more self-sufficient, learning the proverbs, accepting their parents' authority - these are all aspects of my kids' training, and it is all for their good. (And it's pretty nice for me, too. *grin*) They say they understand, and I believe them. I still expect we'll go through times when they will resist the guidance my husband and I give, and when they'll rebel against our requirements, but I do believe they understand.
And I am hopeful.
I have chuckled along with you regarding some of the comments I have received about my Mom's Off Duty Reports. Yes, I am sure part of the reason this experiment is going well has to do with the "newness" of it. Elizabeth told me she actually likes the jobs because they keep her from being "bored." (Yeah, and keeping her supplied with library books helps that problem, too. The girl has read three books in the past 36 hours!) And I am sure some of the boys' enthusiasm will wear off as time goes on. For now, though, doing laundry is fun.
But what happens when this week is over? Hmmm, I still have to come to a certain conclusion on that question. This much I know - we will not be going back to "where we were."

And for today, I know this: my house got dusted, the dishes are done, and the trash has been emptied. I am satisfied. *grin*

Mom's Off Duty - Day Two Report

Once again, I must say I have great kids.

With the list of "Tuesday Jobs" on the table, and the kids already tackling them I went out to the post office.
When I was finished there I decided it was too early for me to return home, so I called to check on the kids and let them know I was going to a park for a little while. I had brought my Bible with me, and found a nice bench in the park on which to sit and meet with God. I fully enjoyed the peace and the presence of the Holy Spirit, and as I sat there He gave me the idea to bring the kids back for a picnic lunch and play time.
So with a satisfied heart, I hopped back in the van and made my way home to find...The floors were vacuumed, (I had to supervise a few touch-ups, but that's OK!) the walls were washed, the dishwasher was emptied and re-loaded, and the counters were wiped. (No pictures today. I got entirely too frustrated with the process of posting them yesterday. Not sure if it was Blogger, my ISP, my computer, or what. But it took too long, and I'm not going to try again until I have forgotten how frustrated it made me. Ha!)

I had to take care of a few things here (No housework, mind you! *grin*) then we packed lunches and went to the park. There was a pond to visit and lots of turtles and bugs to admire. Even a frog for Joshua to catch. We really had a fun time, and I am hoping the kids will recognize (if my not-so-subtle-hints don't make it obvious enough...) how much their help around the house allows us to do more fun things, because of how it frees me up. Teamwork is such a good thing.
After the park, we went to the library and came home with plenty of good reading material. Tomorrows "chores" will include 30 minutes of quiet reading - for sure! And, I think the kids will be dusting, too. Yeah, that sounds like a good Wednesday Job for them to accomplish.

I also had them memorize Proverbs 19:20 today. Listen to advice and accept instruction, and in the end you will be wise. Had to remind them of these wise words a few times throughout the day, and I am praying the wisdom within the proverb will make its way into their hearts.

My Day Two evaluation - This experiment of making the kids fully responsible for carrying out household chores for a week - is going even better than I'd hoped. I am proud of them for their work. I am humbled because part of me didn't expect them to do this well. I am hopeful for the future and how we can work together as a family unit. For those of you who have thought of trying something like this, but have been afraid to actually do it - I say, Go for it!

Mom's Off Duty - Day One Report

Last night before I went to bed I left a list on the table with the kids' house-keeping chores for today. And this morning I was up and ready to go before Elizabeth and Joshua were even awake. Matthew, however, was up and ready to go. My little eager beaver got to work right away, unloading the dishwasher.

I have been mentoring a dear friend for about a year and a half, and I spent the morning with her today. While I was at her house, I received four or five calls from the kids. They ranged from, "The dryer won't start," to, "Do we really need to wait until after lunch to turn on electronics?" to, "Joshua just kicked me in the leg really hard, for no reason." (As if having a reason would make it OK...)
Needless to say, by the time I got the last phone call, my confidence that "all was well" at home was diminishing.
I had a couple errands to run and needed to do my weekly grocery shopping before I went home. So when Amber and I were finished, I took a deep breath, hoped for the best and headed off to accomplish my tasks.
Shopping took me quite awhile today and when I finished I called home just to let the kids know I was on my way. Call it reassurance. Call it a warning. I just wanted to let them know I'd be home soon.

When I got home, I opened the door and heard Josh Groban on the stereo. (Nice touch, kids!) I stepped in and saw this:

Then I looked around and saw this:
Ladies, the house never looks this good when I'm in charge! Straightening up the family room wasn't even on the "To Do" list today.
The laundry was finished and put away. They had made lunch for themselves and cleaned up the kitchen and table.
I'm telling you, I have great kids. *very big grin*

After I was finished with my lunch, the kids asked if I would take them to Caesarland. Normally my immediate answer would have been "No." Because it wasn't raining and they should have been playing outside. And because normally I would have laundry to fold and messes to clean up.
But today, since the kids had done such a great job - since "my" work was all done - I said "yes." And besides, there was a chance of rain.
So we piled into the van and spent a couple hours at Caesarland. The kids played and I did some writing. It was great for everyone. In the end, the kids were full of hugs and "Thank You's" and I was just full of joy.

Once back at home, Joshua was eager to help me get dinner ready. Along the way he told me he kind of likes the work I'm having them do. Music to my ears! Oh, sure, there have been some complaints and bad attitudes creeping in a couple of times, but for the most part my kids have exceeded my expectations for them and this little experiment. I am delighted!

Hoping tomorrow goes as well as today.

P.S. I am also having the kids memorize a proverb each day. Today it was Proverbs 16:24, Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones. Hoping to teach them some wisdom along with housekeeping...

Here We Go!!!

I've made my list. (Or would that be their list?)
The kids have received a pep-talk from me.
We've gone over guidelines and expectations.
I just supervised them sorting laundry and getting a load put into the washer.

I think we're ready to get started!

You may recall, I am not "working" this week. Mom's off duty when it comes to house-work!!! And I have a lot of mixed feelings about it.
Will the kids work well together?
Will they learn a valuable lesson, or is it going to back-fire on me?
Am I going to be able to stick to my commitment to not pick up and wipe up and clean up?
Are the kids going to rise to the occasion - as I know they can - and completely amaze me with their diligence and positive attitudes?
In being responsible for keeping up the house this week, will they realize how much I do every day, and decide to take better care of their own stuff?
Or will they resent me for making them work so hard?

I truly see potential for wonderful benefits this week. I know it could foster teamwork. My kids have already had some fun doing laundry during "training" last week, and at the moment they are all running around playing tag together. I know it is not beyond God to use this week of "Mom's Off Duty" to create fun memories for my kids and strengthen their relationships. And I am praying He'll do just that.

As for me, I have finished going through my Finding Joy manuscript. I have sent it to a couple other speaker/authors to obtain their endorsement. I have made copies for the women in my small group to read and offer feedback. This process went much quicker than I had anticipated, which means my work is on hold, until I get this feedback from my friends.

Sooooo, my kids are taking care of household chores this week. My book is on hold again. This leaves me with only one question.

What am I going to do all week?????

Oh, the possibilities. I'll keep you posted! *grin*