I hide because I 'm afraid that if I am known, I won't be loved.
I heard this statement during the sermon at church on Sunday. And wrote it down because it rang so true.
See, I lived in that hiding place for a very long time. A young mother, bogged down by insecurities and imperfections, wishing she had it all together - like it seemed everyone else did, afraid to let her true self and struggles be known. Oh, that was such a lonely existence!
The crazy thing is, sometimes I still feel that urge to hide.
Even though I have experienced the freedom of being open and honest, even though I am grateful for the grace to be real, sometimes I am still afraid that if I am known I won't be loved.
I'm not the only one who feels this way, am I?
So what's a real girl, living in a real world, with real struggles, and a real need for love to do?
I don't know about you, but I have to run to Jesus first. I need to remember who I am in Him: Forgiven, Redeemed, Made new, Chosen, and LOVED. I cannot hide from Him. He knows everything about me. (See
Psalm 139.) And
still, He loves me.I wonder, what would happen if we had the same confidence that we would be loved by people as we do with Jesus? Better still, what would happen if we loved other people without judgement and as freely as Jesus does? What if we let Him love
through us?
Seems to me we'd see fewer people hiding.
What do you think?
4 comments:
Aw yes, Hiding. I totally get hiding. My problem is that I tend to be an introvert too. I am social with others once I get to know them, but I think I do seem to look as if I am a "hiding" person. Also for me, hiding is safe. My past experiences with people whether it be work/family/friends has many unmet expectations. Whether it be I failed others or others failed me with an expectation. So sometimes for me it is better to not be social with other because I know then people will expect things. I guess you can say I've been burned by people a lot. And it is likely because I'm more of a kind person (people pleaser, want to make others happy). That didn't work out for me a lot in my past, and it had an affect on me. Don't get me wrong I also have imperfections, and I know we are all a work in progress. I guess that makes me think we all need to be Forgiving. Because we all mess up. And you never know exactly what others motives are when you are being mistreated. Sometimes they are having their own personal issues and it just rubs off on you for some reason. What do you think Karen? Maybe Brokeness?--I've been thinking about writing about that on my blog soon. Can we ever truly be the Christ centered people God wants us to be on this side of Heaven? I do want to be that person you talked about--loving without judgement and God loving through us. Now that is quite lovely. OOPs, sorry I wrote a novel on your comments section. ((hugs))
Mommy - Sometimes I think it's scary how much you and I have in common. Introverted, feeling safe hiding, people-pleasing. Yep. I "get" all that!
And, yes, I think brokenness has a huge impact on our relationships. What's the saying? Hurting people hurt people.
That's why we need Jesus to bring us healing. So we can love like He does.
Oh, and, thanks for the novel. *wink*
Well my sister in Christ, we do have a lot in common! It is weird huh. That's why I wish you lived next door, I would bring coffee over or soda for you and we could talk :) -I think you told me you drink soda for caffeine- And yes. Jesus brings the ultimate healing and Peace. I just try to get out of my own head/ hurt feelings when someone does wrong to me now, and tell myself you don't know what is going on in their life for them to be that way towards you. Because it is so true! Hurting people hurt people. I like to refer to it as Broken people. Because in some way or another we are all broken. Oh my, here is another novel. (your welcome! ha ha) :)
Mommy - That "next door" thing would be wonderful. :) And you're right - no coffee for me! Oh, and here in Michigan we call it "pop". (Just wanted to get you ready for when you move next door. You know, so you don't sound like a tourist. *wink*)
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