Tuesday, October 07, 2014

Or a Son...

Yes, for me it's a son.

Definitely a son.

Of the 16-year-old variety.

And some days I wonder which one of us will make it to our next birthday. *ahem*

I mentioned a couple weeks ago that Josh and Matthew have taken over washing the dishes since Elizabeth left for college. And that my concern with Matthew is the copious amounts of water he uses to get the job done.
Well, Josh gives me a different concern. That is, he often doesn't really do a complete job. As in, I look at the dishes after he's "finished" and there's still food on them. Usually on the outside. So I call him back to the kitchen and have him re-wash.

And that NEVER goes over well.

Most recently (two nights ago) he was annoyed with me for making him re-wash the pots and pans - including the OUTSIDE. To him, the grease on the side of the pan looked like water and he thought it was clean. So he thought I was unreasonable for thinking he should have washed it anyway. Not to mention my demand suggestion that he ought to have checked the shiny surface by swiping his finger over it to see if it really was water - at which time he would have realized it was grease and would have known it needed washing and would have saved us from another argument discussion about how to wash dishes.
Needless to say, that interaction was not a pleasant one. Both Josh and I were extremely frustrated with each other. Though, I must say, he did a great job re-washing the pots and pans when I stood there watching him. They came out very clean. And I told him so. (But he was still annoyed with me.)

So, as the night wore on and we both calmed down I decided I wanted to address the situation one more time. I was thinking about the occasions when I thought my own mother was annoying for "making" me clean things and take care of items that didn't seem like they needed it. I recalled finally understanding her ways when I began being responsible for maintaining my own home. And I prayed God would help my son see my heart as I made that explanation to him.
I walked out to the living room where Josh was doing his Chemistry homework and sat down beside him. Then I shared my heart, and told him once more that I appreciated the way he washed the pans the second time.
Josh didn't throw his arms around me in a hug. He didn't tell me he understands, and will keep my words in mind the next time he does his chores. He didn't promise to never be annoyed with me again because he trusts that I always have good intentions. But we ended the night at peace with each other, and that was good enough for me.

Besides, I'm still holding onto the hope that by the time he's 40 he'll realize I was right. *wink*


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