Under Conviction

Conviction by the Holy Spirit is such a wonderful thing to me.

Just knowing God knows what I need - and cares enough about me to make that need clear to my heart - fills me with gratitude.

But sometimes the conviction leaves me feeling a little silly. Like, Gee, God, I'm kind of embarrassed that You had to remind me about this concept. Again.
So, today I find myself eating a slice of heavenly humble pie. Again.

See, last week I began a new study with the Women's Group which is meeting Friday morning's at Edgewood. We're watching and discussing Jennifer Rothschild's DVD series, Walking By Faith: Lessons Learned in the Dark. The key concept from the introductory session is: "It can be well with my soul, even when it may not be well with my circumstance." I love that concept. I fully agree with it. And I loved the time we spent talking about it Friday morning. It is so good to remember the importance of keeping our focus on God, rather than our circumstance.
But then a funny thing happened. (OK. It isn't really "funny", except in the ironic sense. *ahem*) I got busy with my day - making final arrangements for the next day's festival, returning phone calls, following up on email, making plans, and carrying out activities. The day got so hectic, and I began to feel anxious. Running here and there, doing this and that, even getting help from a couple co-workers but not feeling like I was going to be able to get it all done.
And by the time the day was over (late!) my soul was not in a condition which I would describe as "well".

Can you see the problem?
Do you have an idea what the Holy Spirit was about to say to my heart?
I had just sat through a lesson about walking by faith. I know very well what it means to keep my focus on God. Goodness, I have led Bible studies and women's retreats on that very thing! And here I was, allowing my circumstance to steal my joy. It was not well with my soul because it was not well with my circumstance. And that correlation just should not be.
So gently, but with undeniable clarity, the Holy Spirit convicted me and I knew: It can be will with my soul, even when it may not be well with my circumstance. Eyes up, Karen. Eyes on Me!

Here I am now, sitting down to eat that heavenly humble pie - and get my focus adjusted.

Will someone pass me a fork, please?