Finding Joy

So, I am not sure I've ever even mentioned it here, but I have a new job.
Well, sort of.
I mean, it's sort of new. If you consider a four month old job "new".
It is super part-time - as in I only work nine hours, every other weekend. Which is part of the reason I haven't said much about it here. Not a lot of time to accumulate blog-worthy stories. *ahem*

But that all changed this past weekend.

That is, when I got home Sunday night I realized I had just lived such a story.
You see, the thing is, I have been struggling with finding joy in my work.
I am a Resident Assistant at a care facility for the elderly. And you KNOW how much I love working with that population. When the job became available and I was hired, well, I figured it was a perfect match for my passions and gifting. (And the fact that it was only nine hours every other weekend made me think it wouldn't interfere with family life.)
But when I was finally on the job and reality set in, let's just say it didn't meet my expectations.
The biggest disappointment was this: my list of tasks and things-to-do (combined with the amount of time I have to accomplish them) doesn't leave much room for doing what I love most. That is to say, if I want to complete the things for which I am being paid I don't have time to spend loving on, listening to, and caring for the residents. Oh, we have brief conversations in passing - and there are moments of joking and laughter while I am rushing around the dining room. But I miss the opportunities to sit with a person, and hear their life story, and pray for them, and let them know they are not forgotten.
Honestly, there is one task I feel like I don't do well - so that gets me down. Cuz I tend toward perfectionism and, well, that just isn't a good combination. So I gravitate toward joylessness when that part of the job is being featured.
And there are various reasons why I was wrong about the job not interfering with family life.
Truth be told, quitting has entered my mind more than once.

However.
Nonetheless.
Notwithstanding.
But God.
Yes. Let's go with But God.
But God has convinced me to stay.
Early on in my tenure at the care facility I was driving through town, seemingly following a yellow car. (As in, everywhere it turned, so did I. Only I wasn't following it on purpose. It just seemed like we were going the same way.) And yellow cars always prompt me to pray for a certain young lady who is precious to my heart. (Hence, the fact that this yellow car was constantly in front of me made me feel like God had something He wanted to accomplish for my young friend.) So I was praying for this dear girl, asking God to provide the financial support she needs for the ministry in which she is embarking. And it was as if He whispered to my heart, Hey, you have that job now. Why don't you devote one weekend each month to the support of her ministry?
And I thought, God! That's a brilliant idea!!!
So I committed in that moment to work one weekend each month for her.
And the idea filled my heart with joy.
Which is why each time the thought of quitting enters my mind I push it aside.
Therefore, Sunday afternoon as I found myself emptying trash cans and soiled linen barrels (The not-so-glamorous aspect of my job.) I began praying. God, thank You that I am able to do this job for Emma this weekend. Thank You that I am able to earn money to give to her ministry. I sought to take my eyes off of myself and remember that I am HIS - His vessel for His purposes. I stopped feeling sorry for myself because my job isn't all I had hoped it would be. And I carried on with my to-do list, while doing my best to find moments to love the residents.
(Even had an opportunity to pray with one lady!)
And the crazy thing is, at the end of my shift - I felt joy in my heart.
I did my best to recall the entire shift, and I honestly couldn't remember joylessness in it.
I realized, once I made the decision to alter my focus - it seems God corrected my perspective and changed my heart. And therein I found joy.

Does your focus need altering in any areas of your life today?