A Chat with Joshua

We drove through the night to get to Myrtle Beach. One of our saving graces was our phones, and our ability to text.
That is, the kids spent lots of the final hours chatting with their friends.
And then Joshua and I got into it a bit. I thought you might enjoy listening in...

Joshua: i can see you!
(His eyes were closed.)
Me: Can u c me when ur eyes r closed?
No but my eyes and (sic) closed. it just looks that way to throw u off.
huh?
Yes. exactly. my knoledge is was to strong for you! my teachers edjimacated me:)
That's great. But they forgot to teach you how to spell! hahaha
Yeah that was the point! i meant to spell it, that or my grammar teach stinks. in a good way ya know...
is there a good way?...
Nopeee. you take a long time to respond
maybe becuz im not as cool as u
and maybe becuz i was sending another text :P
You got that right, but still and learn how to spell because
do u want 2 finish that thought? it didnt make sense

At this point we had a verbal conversation and Joshua explained that he meant I should learn how to spell the word, 'because'. I came back by explaining that I was trying to be 'cool' like him by abbreviating.

Ya sure my homie lets tlk chat & c how long u last gurrl
ok then well write formal essays and c how long U last hahaha
bring it gurl.
but u cant do dings like i do. ya c i told u.
ur weird
Yep thats meee. well wanna do the formal essay? ill send one.
Uh, no. You don't send formal essays. You write them on paper. In paragraph form. IN CURSIVE.
Yeah. Bring it!
Okay, so one bright sunny day a little girl named karen was walking down the beach. little did she know that she was being watched. not by a person, but by a TERIDACTLE! (a flying bird dinasaur.) after hours of stalking her, it swooped down and with one whoosh it picked up little helpless karen. but luckily the handson strong and unstopible joshua hossink. with one slash of his sword the bird fell down and died. then karen was falling 100000000 feet at 185 miles per hour, and josh quickly threw a trampoline under her and he saved her life. then she was very greatful so she gave him $100,000,000,000 and anything else he wanted, and he lived hapily ever after. the end. and no way am i writing this out in cursive.
OK. Correct the spelling and punctuation and I'll let the cursive go. *wink*
Nopee. bedtime. byee
sleep well
and keep ur feet down

I'm telling you, there's never a dull moment with him.
I'll give you another example tomorrow! *grin*