Thursday, May 05, 2011

Up-front Struggling

So, last weekend Elizabeth wanted to do something with a friend and Brian and I were struggling with the decision to say 'yes' or 'no'. I mean, we trust Elizabeth. She's never given us a reason to NOT trust her. Even so, I don't want to just say 'yes' to everything.
Typically when we have a decision like this one to make, Brian and I talk about it and then let the kids know the conclusion we've reached. But this time we did it a little differently. (Not by plan, I must admit. It's just the way circumstances lined up.)
This time Brian and I struggled with the decision right in front of Elizabeth. We told her why we were leaning toward a 'no' answer, and she asked questions.
At one point she asked, "What do you think we're going to do?" To which I replied, "You don't seriously think I'm going to give you ideas, do you???" LOL!
We had a good discussion about being a teenager, making good decisions - and bad ones, and how that can all be influenced by peers. We shared our concerns with Elizabeth and reached an agreement.
Ultimately, we said, "Yes." And she was happy.

So was I.

Because I had a really good feeling about the struggle we'd just faced to make that decision. It seemed good to struggle up-front like that. I think it was good for Elizabeth to be part of the process and not just to hear the verdict.

And I pray God will keep leading us through this parenting thing!



gianna said...

It's my prayer that our kids can see us struggling as we raise them. That we can be real, yet not scare them at the same time!

Irritable Mother said...

Gianna - You don't think they should get scared??? *wink*