Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Young Love

OK, Ladies - Because I'm pretty sure there are no men who read here! - think back with me a while. Probably many, many years.

Do you remember your first love???

Elizabeth is giving me cause to re-visit my teenage days, and my certainty that I was in love. She and her beau will have their "six month anniversary" this week, and she has been busy making a special gift for him - to mark this milestone in their relationship.
Besides being proud of her thoughtfulness and impressed with creativity, I'm chuckling to myself at her fascination with young love. She told me a few days ago that this young man finally said, "I love you," to her, and the giddy smile on her face was just precious.
Yes, I remember well what it was like to be in love that first time.
When I was in the eighth grade I thought I had met the boy I was going to marry.
And then it happened again in ninth grade.
And tenth.
And twelfth.
I finally met him for real during my freshman year of college.
With each passing year, and as my relationship with Brian deepened, I realized I had no idea what love really was all those years before.
Goodness, we're going to celebrate our eighteenth anniversary in a few weeks, and now I'm thinking I didn't truly understand what love really was when we got married! Because with every passing day we mature, and our hearts grow. (At least in theory. *wink*)

As I look at my daughter and observe her infatuation with young love, the desire rises in me to tell her she has no idea what real love is about, just yet.
But I know full well that I would not have listened to my mother if she tried to tell me something like that when I was a teenager. Because I knew so much more than my mom in those days! And I don't want to deny the special feelings she has for this young man.
So, after talking about it with a friend, this is what I have decided: I am going to acknowledge the feelings she has for E, and will share in her joy. But I will remind her that it will only get better as she enters adulthood. Without down-playing what she's feeling now, I want her to know the love she will experience as an adult is going to out-shine the feelings she has today.

Any of you who've already had this conversation have any advice for me?



TheUnSoccerMom said...

I think I just took advice from you! :o)

Christen loves to be "in-love". She's single at the moment and has been for a little over a month now. Sure does make my parenting job a bit easier.

I just try to be honest with her and encourage her to be open with me so she'll tell me about her "love" interests. :o)

I'm afraid I can be a bit blunt at time though, and I realize I shouldn't be. I'm the type that I want to know the truth, regardless of how it will make me feel at the time. I have to realize not everyone is like that. sigh...

SO, I keep praying for Christen's future husband and for Christen. I want her to experience and have the kind of love a husband and wife share, when it's time for that. ;o)

Leah @ Point Ministries said...

I told my step-son to always treat his girlfriend like he would want his sister (if he had one) or his mother or me to be treated. He and his girlfriend (19 years old each) are just goofy in love. It may last, it may not, but I want it to be special for them if it does.

Irritable Mother said...

Jodi - Yeah. I want Elizabeth to feel confident that she can be open with me, too. I did NOT go there with my mom, and don't want to repeat that scenario with my daughter.
It always comes back to prayer, doesn't it? Because GOD can handle it! :o)

Leah - I recently heard of a mom taking her son out on a date to 'teach' him how to treat his dates. I thought that was such a great idea!
When I was 19, I was dating Brian. Actually, we've been together since just a couple months after I turned 18...