Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Heart Laundry

I have been writing in my journal quite a bit lately - enjoying the way God speaks to my heart as I write. Today I want to share one of my recent entries with you.
A few weeks ago we were at a fun hotel for the weekend, and I found myself spending time in the laundry room because Matthew's "accidents" out-numbered the supply of pants he had packed for the weekend. Needless to say, I was not happy. So I grabbed my journal as I made my way to do the wash, knowing it would be good for me to pour my feelings out to God.
What I didn't expect was that as I was washing Matthew pants, God had plans to cleanse my heart. But I've learned that God often does the unexpected thing. And it's always good.
So if you're in need of a heart cleansing today, come with me to do some wash!

This time with my journal, I'm in the laundry room at Splash Universe. Because between yesterday and today Matthew has already wet and/or pooped in three pair of pants. Lord, I am so tired of this!!!
I know "someday" we'll be over this. I know "This, too, shall pass." But I'm living in it right now, and it's driving me nuts!
I simply cannot understand why an eight-year-old little boy cannot control his bodily functions. I'm tired and frustrated and ready to be done with this.

Pause for a moment of reflection conviction.

Lord, do You ever wonder why a 37-year-old grown woman cannot control her temper? Do You ever get tired and frustrated and feel ready to be done with me???
Father, thank You for Your patience with me. Thank You that You have compassion on me and that You extend amazing grace to me every single day. I do not deserve Your favor. I do not deserve Your unending compassion. But You give it to me anyway. Thank You for the blood of Jesus which covers all my sin and makes me white as snow. Thank You for giving Jesus so I could wear His righteousness - so I could experience your grace and forgiveness.
Thank You for giving Jesus so this 37-year-old grown woman - who ought to know better than to let petty accidents make her so angry - can be forgiven of her sin time and time again.

I am so thankful for God's grace and patience. Are you?
Whatever you're facing today, whether your heart is fresh or it needs some cleaning, I pray you will know the presence of our God and realize His grace in your life.

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luvmy4sons said...

Amen. Bless you sweet sister. I have often thought the same thing. Sometimes I think to myself that God is only trying to get the poop off my butt and just like the one year old who screams and cries to be held down to have his or her butt wiped I fight and resist and moan and complain at my God when he is just trying to clean me! Being a parent is surely one of the best refining methods around!

StephG said...

It was as if you wrote that for me. I've been feeling discouraged lately. I teach and train and encourage and they still do the same, naughty things. I sit there and say, "they just need to obey the first time!" Yet, I don't control my emotions, I get frustrated, irritated and sometimes raise my voice!
I can imagine God saying the same, "She just needs to obey."

I need to practice a bit more what I preach to my children.

I need to remember to be patient when I don't feel it. Loving when I'm frustrated. Gently when I'm irritated.

Thank you for the reminder today.

Today is my day to "obey the first time"

Proverbs 27:19 said...

Once again, God has used a child to teach and convict us.


Leah said...

God has been and continues to be so unbelievably patient with me. I know He must just look at me sometimes and think, "What a hopeless case she is!!" Thank you, Jesus, for mercy and grace.


Amanda said...

I am, I am , I am!! He is teaching me humility and graciousness all OVER THE PLACE this morning!! Praise God!!

Great thoughts Karen!!! Love your Ah-Ha moments!

Many blessings-

km said...

Thank you for being so transparent. I know that when I have hard days I'm not the only one. But, hearing that makes it more real.

mamajil said...

this is so good!! THanks for sharing it!

Happyhome said...

I am so glad He doesn't tire of doing MY dirty laundry or I'd be in big trouble! Great post! How are the travel plans coming?

Mrs.Naz@BecomingMe said...

I am grateful indeed. Thank you.

Dakota's Mom said...

I am SO grateful for His forgiveness every moment. It's amazing how He never gets tired of saving me.

Jessica said...

Wow, that would be frustrating, but what a great pic of God's love for us.
Do you think there's a physical reason this happens to your son? Not trying to say anything negative, but a friend's five year old was having the same problems and it turned out she had some sort of problem. Can't remember now, but like spina bifida or something.
Anyways, I was just curious.
I would hate washing poopy pants. Yuck. Go you! :-)