Last Thursday I spoke for a moms' group, and - as often happens - I got into a conversation with one of the moms after the meeting. This particular mom was feeling quite burnt out. "Trapped" is the word she used. And as we spoke, it became very apparent to me that this young mother really needed some time away from her precious brood. However, (And I always hate the However) she was also feeling quite guilty for wanting time away. She seemed to believe that she needed to just pray more and read her Bible more so she could love being with her kids more. All.the.time.I did my best to encourage her - to empathize with her guilty feeling (I have soooo been there!) - and to assure her it is OK to get away for a while. I shared with her my certainty that I am a better mom when I have breaks now and then. It's better for me, and it's better for my kids.
But I didn't want to leave her there. Because I know from experience where one's guilty feelings can lead, and the thoughts which can follow. The road down which I have gone has included thoughts like, I'm a terrible mom. I'll never get this right. Why did God give me children? I'm a terrible mom. All because I needed a break. *sigh*So, I asked this young mother to consider what God might have to say to her through this circumstance. Although we need breaks from our children ocassionally, we agreed that God never needs a break from us. I shared a devotion from Finding Joy which illustrated this concept. Then I asked this young mother if she could turn her guilty feelings of wanting a break into a chorus of thanksgiving - because of God's love for her. And because of the Truth that HE never wants a break from her.She thought she could.I'm learning more and more the value of looking for God's spin on my circumstances. Perhaps it's my struggle with depression and my tendency to think negatively about my circumstances which makes His spin so necessary. My mind's natural bent is toward self-deprecation. I think that's why I could feel so deeply for that young mom. And seeking God's spin - His Truth - has set me free.What about you? How have you experienced God's Truth in the middle of your circumstance?
3 comments:
I have been doing a bible study about Jesus and this reminds me of the many times after he did great work that he would find a quiet place alone and pray. Even Jesus needed quiet time now and then.
Oh, yeah! And not necessarily a break to go get groceries (although that is nice). Like a real break that makes you excited to go home and see them again.
I hate when people write about how they just want snuggle time with their kids because I never wanted that. And then one day I came home from a retreat with my husband to my kids feeling that way and looking forward to snuggling.
Instead I was greeted with chaos and craziness.
It was at that moment that I realized that we are not a snuggling family.
Oh, yes we hug and laugh and sit on laps. But I won't call us a snuggling family.
No, we are the punch-you-in-the-face-if-you-don't-do-what-I-want-you-to kind of family.
Jen - And so do we!!!
Gianna - I remember going on a writing retreat for my first book, and I came home "early" because I missed my kiddos. Didn't know that could happen! LOL
I also remember thinking it was precious when my kids were sick, because they just wanted to cuddle. Mine aren't very snuggly, either, and though I was sorry they didn't feel well, it sure was sweet to have them culddling under my arms.
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