Wednesday, November 09, 2011

Reconciliation

I love it when God uses my interactions with my children to help me understand HIM better.

Saturday night Joshua and I got into it with each other. He was giving me all kinds of attitude about his chores, wouldn't listen to me or do what I was asking, and I was angry. He finally yelled at me about being annoying and stomped off to his room.
I.was.so.angry! It isn't like I was asking him to do anything that difficult. And he's been driving me nuts lately with his attitude and refusal to obey. I told him (in a very loud voice) that I realize he's a teenager now, he's growing up and desiring independence. BUT, I said, I am still the parent and he is still the child - and he needs to obey. (That's when he yelled at me about being annoying...)

I stood then, in the kitchen, feeling like I couldn't wait for the next five years to fly by. Realizing I don't really want it to be that way. In my anger I didn't want to have to deal with Joshua or his attitude anymore. But in my heart I want to love my son and have a peaceful relationship with him.
And I prayed God would work in his heart.

Within the hour, Joshua came out to where I was and apologized for yelling at me. I could tell from his face and his tone of voice, he was sincere. He says he's "sorry" for things all the time, but you know he doesn't mean it. This incident was not one of those times. And I extended forgiveness to him.
In that moment, my heart changed toward Joshua. I truly was not angry anymore. I knew that I love my son, and that would never change. It was beautiful.
He went back to his room to do whatever, and I pondered what had taken place in my heart. That's when I realized God had just given me a picture of our relationship with Him. Just like my son's sincere apology brought reconciliation to the two of us, our confession and repentance reconciles us with God. I was no longer angry, and in the same way God turns His wrath away.

What a gift that was! I knew the condition of my heart, the way I felt about and saw my son. How much more does God take delight when we return to Him! I am so thankful for the blood of Jesus which makes that reconciliation possible!

Karen

5 comments:

Leah @ Point Ministries said...

I am praying for you and that sweet boy!

TheUnSoccerMom said...

I love it when Christen can come to me and truly apologize, instead of apologizing so she can get in my good graces.

Praying for you both! Oh how these teenage years can be so hard. (((HUGS)))

love you!

Amanda said...

Completely relevant and meaningful and precious as always... you have a knack for moving me to tears! :)

Irritable Mother said...

Leah - Thank you. So much!

Jodi - Yes. The true apology blesses my heart.

Amanda - Tears can be a good thing. *wink*

Mom of 12 said...

Don't you just love it when you can see a glimpse of the amazing grownup person your kid can become? It sounds like you are doing a great job raising a fantastic son.
Sandy