Wednesday, January 20, 2016

Inside Sadness

I've never hidden that I'm a little behind the times, have I?
Like in the fact that I am still using a basic phone. Hey, it still works just as well as the day I got it. Three and a half years ago. Although, I think I want to get a smart phone in the next few months.
I mean, really? I just want a camera. But who buys cameras anymore?

Ahhh, I digress.

Anyway, about being behind the times - I finally saw the movie Inside Out this weekend.
To be fair, we did try to see it in the movie theaters months ago.
Twice, in fact. But both times when we got there the showing had been sold out.
Oh, I had tried to get the family out the door early.
"Relax, Mom," they said.
"We have plenty of time," they said.
"Don't be in such a rush," they said.
"Sorry, that show is all sold out," the gal at the ticket counter said.
"Told you so!!!!" I wanted to say. (Someone must have been keeping Anger away from my control panel in order to keep me quiet. *ahem*)

So, this weekend, we finally saw it. And although the movie wasn't what I had expected - I loved it.
Because it allowed me to think about feelings.
Was it just me? Or did other people who've seen Inside Out also feel exhausted when Joy was running around trying to keep everything "happy?" I mean, I'm all for being happy and having a good time. But that character had me gasping for breaths with the way she was racing here and there, trying to keep Sadness from touching anything.
And as the movie played on, and Riley kept going deeper and deeper into her pit of despair, I just wanted to jump into the scene and hug her. Invite her to cry on my shoulder. Let her know she was loved. That the darkness wouldn't overwhelm her. That it was OK to miss her old home, yet encourage her that her new home would be good, too.

I was so glad that's where the story line ended up going.

Because as one who has struggled with feelings of despair, I know. Simply having someone say, "Cheer up!" "It isn't that bad!" "Everyone has tough times." "This, too, shall pass," does nothing to help.
Forgive me, Joy, for not receiving your remarks the way they're likely intended, but when you're in the bottom of a pit - words are pretty meaningless.
I remember in those days, wishing someone would just put an arm around me and tell me it was OK to feel sad, frustrated, upset, even lost. Platitudes weren't what I needed. I so desperately wanted to know that I was still loved - even when I wasn't feeling lovely. (Not that such gestures would have kept me from needing anti-depressants, but I sure would've felt less lonely.)
So I was delighted at the end of the movie to see memories touched by all of Riley's emotions. I was thankful to see an acknowledgement on the screen that sadness and hard times can be mixed in with joy - that they aren't mutually exclusive. And I was glad for Hollywood's encouragement for us to put our arms around a sad person and invite them to share their feelings - that we might love them where they're at, and encourage them to keep putting one foot in front of the other.

Have you seen Inside Out? What did you think?

Karen

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