Thankful Thursday

OK, I know there is a "thing" out there in Blogland called Thankful Thursday. I don't know where it originates, and I have never officially participated in it before. But this morning I sat down to have my quiet time with such a thankful heart, and as I started writing in my journal I remembered today's Thursday, and I thought, Ah, yes! Thankful Thursday. That's what today is!

So what is it which has me so thankful today? Well, I went into Matthew's room this morning to gather his laundry and I saw his pull-up on the floor. I called to him to come and get it so he could put it in the trash, and as I looked closer at the pull-up I noticed something unusual.

It was dry!

I said, "Matthew! Your pull-up is dry!" And I gave him a great big hug.

Matthew will be eight years old in a week, and trying to get him to be dry through the night has been a long road. Within the past week we have started trying a new thing - a hormone/medicine which is delivered through a nasal spray. I have heard other people have had success with this spray, but we tried the pills several months ago and they didn't seem to help.
But this morning, Matthew's pull-up was bone dry.

I have hope.

And I am thankful!

I am also thankful that another one of my "waits" is almost over. Saturday is the day I get to speak for a Mother's Day Luncheon. I have given a couple previews of my talk in previous posts, (Here and here, in case you missed them.) and I am so looking forward to sharing this message with these women. I am also thankful for the confidence I have that none of my planes will need to be de-iced on this trip, so I am not concerned about late flights.

I know God is fully in control and He has been preparing me for this event, as well as the women who will be in attendance. And for that, I am also thankful.
If you think about me Saturday morning, please pray for me - that I would communicate clearly and effectively, and that I would be sensitive to the Spirit's leading as I interact with women throughout the meeting. Pray also for the women who will be listening - that God would continue to prepare their hearts, and they would be open to whatever He wants to say to them.

Thank you so much, dear friends. You are a blessing to me!

Walking in the Rain

It's been crazy-busy around here the past few days. Many times I have wanted to post some encouraging thoughts for you - like the Grace God served up for dinner through Matthew Saturday - but time has eluded me.
I am heading out the door in a few minutes to speak for a MOPS group this morning, but before I do I want to share with you another of the entries that "didn't make it" into my next book. (Yes, I'm "cheating" by posting something I've already written - but it's the best I can do right now!) Praying God will use these words to encourage and uplift you today!

Walking in the Rain
The first three days of school were beautiful, sunny days and the walk to the bus stop was quite pleasant. But on the fourth day it was raining and Matthew asked me, “Mom, how do we get to the bus stop when it’s raining?” Strange question for a second grader to ask, you’re thinking? Well, prior to this year the kids went to a school which didn’t have busses. I drove them. They never had to walk ten minutes to get into our van. So I understood his question.
To be honest, I was wondering a similar thing. How are the boys going to get to the bus stop this morning? I shouldn’t just send them out in the rain, should I? They’ll get all wet. I can’t send them to school wet! Perhaps I should drive them to the bus stop. Knowing, however, I didn’t want to set that standard, I answered simply, “You walk.”
At first the boys scoffed at the idea of walking through the rain to get to the bus, and I would be lying if I said I did not momentarily take on a Bad Mommy Complex. I speculated if the other parents were going to make their kids walk through the rain. Perhaps they would drive their kids to the stop and wonder, as they saw my kids walking, What kind of mother would subject her children to the elements like this? Someone, call the authorities!
Not wanting to be a Bad Mommy, I asked my husband for his opinion. Reason won out and convinced me the boys would be just fine, even if they got a little wet. In fact, they ended up being excited about the rain because we told them they each got to carry their own umbrella. (With promises, of course, the umbrellas would not become “swords” or some other weapon when the rain stopped!)

Equipping my boys for the rain by giving them an umbrella reminded me of the ways God protects me in foul weather. Sometimes God uses a sermon I hear at church to speak directly to a difficult situation through which I am going. Other times a friend speaks for Him by sharing an encouraging word with me, or by giving testimony to His faithfulness in her own life. Of course, He has given us the Scriptures and they are full of life. On most days you will find me with a Bible verse in my pocket and God has used those scriptures to be my umbrella in the rain many, many times.
Unlike me, however, God never debates with Himself about sending us out in the rain. I questioned my own judgment and ultimately relied on my husband’s wisdom before sending the boys out in the rain with their umbrellas. God knows exactly what we need to make it through the storms in our lives.
While I believe sometimes He does “drive us to the bus stop,” I know He often gives us an umbrella and tells us we need to walk. It gives me great amounts of peace and hope when I consider God’s perfect knowledge of what is necessary in my life to accomplish His purpose in me. I am confident God never looks at a situation in my life and wonders, How is Karen going to deal with this rain today? I shouldn’t let her go through it, should I? What if she gets wet? I can’t let her get wet. She might not like Me anymore. Maybe I should just let her bypass this storm. Rather, He leads me as He knows best, and I am blessed as a result.

So with hugs and kisses and an umbrella for each one, my husband and I watched our boys skip down the driveway in the rain. Brian smiled at me and said, “They are going to get soaked!”
“Yeah, but they’ll dry off,” was my reply.

Your Turn: What are the ways God equips you for the storms in your life? How does it make you feel to know He is never uncertain about the things through which He allows you to go? Take some time to think about the rain through which you have been walking lately. If you're feeling troubled about the rain, talk to God about it. Thank Him for protecting you and ask Him to help you trust His perfect care for you.

Growing Pains

If this isn't a sure sign my little girl is growing up, I don't know what is.

Last night I borrowed some of her clothes!

OK, it was just one item, but it's the principle of the whole thing which has me gasping for air. I borrowed my little girl's growing daughter's stuff!
I was getting ready to go to Brian's Grand Opening for Fitness Together. It was a wine and cheese party and I wanted to get dressed up, so I choose a new skirt to wear. OK, it has been too long since I have worn nylons and I realized as I was getting dressed that I only had black ones. That simply wasn't going to do.
Humph!
Then I thought, Hey, Elizabeth has nylons. I'll just borrow some from her! As I asked her about it she told me where I could find them and I went to her room to get them. It was during my journey down the stairs I realized the significance of the moment.
I used to tickle her little toes as I put booties on her feet.
I used to squeeze her pudgy little legs into tights.
As she grew and slimmed down, I still helped her get those tights on.
One day she informed me she no longer liked tights, and didn't want to wear them anymore.
A year or two later she agreed to try wearing nylons with her dresses, and I taught her how to put them on herself.
And the next thing I know, I'm asking her if I can borrow them!

My little girl is growing up, and I know it because I wore her nylons last night.

I remember wearing some of my mom's things. She had a bright pink dress I just loved and I wore it quite a bit. Makes me wonder if Elizabeth will ever want to borrow some of my clothes.
Some day, will she start wearing make-up and want to borrow my lipstick? Will she ask to get her ears pierced sometime, and wish to borrow my earrings? And as we're picking out the perfect earrings for her to wear on her first date, will she ask me what I did the first time I went out with a boy?

It is a joy for me to see my little girl growing up. Sometimes I just sit and watch her, simply amazed that the young lady in front of me used to be a babe in my arms. Truly, the time is passing quickly. And though there are moments when I wonder if I am going to "make it," I know I don't want to wish these days away. I want to cherish them and live in them fully - loving God, loving my children, and loving life.

Now, if I could just find some of my own nylons!

I'm "It"

No, I am not on an ego trip. I am not saying I'm "It" as in - I'm all that is good and wonderful!
I mean, I'm "It" as in - I was the last one touched in the game of tag at the bus stop this morning, and as the boys were running to the bus one of them called out, "Mrs. Hossink is It when we play tomorrow!"

We had made our half-mile trek to the bus stop and God, in His usual goodness, managed to calm every one's spirits and improve our attitudes as we walked. When we arrived, the other little boy who is usually there touched Joshua and called, "You're It!" as he ran in the opposite direction. Joshua quickly tagged Matthew and ran. Then I heard, "Awww, Matthew. You don't need to cry."
Matthew, being the little guy, doesn't like to be to It. He can't run as fast as the others and ends up being It for the whole game. It just isn't fun being It for so long. So he was upset.
I remember being the littlest one, and not liking it. So I stepped in and said, "Betcha can't get me!" Amazingly, he did!
Hmmmm, I wonder how that happened! *grin*
Now the race was on. I chased Joshua and the other boy and we went back and forth with the tagging. I sort of think the other boy was surprised that I was playing tag, as if a grown adult shouldn't be playing a child's game, but he seemed to get over it quickly enough.
And I'm telling you, fourth grade boys can really run. I took it easy on Matthew so he could tag me, but I was huffing and puffing to tag the older boys. Seriously, before I started playing I thought, Hey, I just ran two and a half miles this morning and came home and did twenty-six push-ups. (Un-modified, Thank you!) Surely, I can take these kids on in a game of tag.
But when the bus came around the corner, I wasn't just happy to see the kids off to school - I was breathing heavy and thankful for an end to the game!

Yeah, an end until tomorrow morning. Because I am still It.
And I'm sure the boys won't forget it!

What I Want My Kids to Know

Last night I sat with my kids out in the hallway - like we do every night before bed.
We waited for this one to get a blanket, that one to get a drink, and the other one to get comfortable - like we do every night before bed.
I read to them from the Bible - like we do every night before bed.
During the reading one child kicked another, one interrupted with unrelated comments a few times, and the other inserted odd noises here and there - like they do every night before bed.
I had finished reading and was about to pray - like we do every night before bed. But instead I leaned back against the wall and closed my eyes. I was "this close" to both yelling and crying.
Yelling, because we go through this routine every night and my kids know how I expect them to behave. I get tired of telling them to not look at one another, that this isn't "goof off" time, and they can wait for another drink until we're finished. The fact that Brian was gone didn't help matters at all. (Anyone else dislike "doing" bedtime alone???)
And crying, because I was feeling like the kids aren't "getting" these devotions we're doing. I felt like I'm not getting this part of spiritual training right and I was discouraged.
So I sat there with my eyes closed and I prayed, Lord, please help my kids understand. Though our family prayer time never seems to go well in my eyes, please help my children grow in their faith and knowledge of You - in spite of my failures and failed expectations.
And then I had the sense I just needed to talk openly with my children about my desires for them - about what I want them to know.
So I said, "Ya know, guys, when I was a kid my mom and dad didn't read the Bible with me. I didn't know God's Word. I didn't know God was interested in me or that He knew every detail of my life. I believed in Him, but I didn't know Him.
"The reason Daddy and I read the Bible and pray with you every night is because we want you to know God and His Word. We want you to know He loves you, He knows everything about you, and He wants to be a part of every moment of your lives.
"I don't want this family prayer time to just be something we do after you brush your teeth and before you go to bed. I want it to be a time when you learn God's Word more, and when you get to know Him better.
"He loves you so much, and I just want you to know that!"

Then I prayed for my kids - individually. I thanked God for loving them and for knowing everything about them. I prayed for their present and their future, for who they are and who they will be.
And though my eyes were closed, I could tell they were sitting perfectly still as they listened to my words on their behalf.
Even now I pray my children will grow in their relationship with our Father through family prayer times which are, at times, crazy. I pray they will grow up convinced of the love and goodness of our God, Who knows every hair on their heads and Who loves them with an everlasting love. I pray the seed of God's Word is being planted in their hearts now and that it will flourish and grow, as in good soil, that it may produce an abundant crop for the glory of God. And I pray they my learn to love His Word, that in it they may find life and hope for all their days.

Yes. This is what I want my kids to know.

I Did It!

I did it! I completed the 5K this afternoon. As in, I ran the whole way. I didn't stop, or slow down to walk.

I did it!!!

And I can totally see how people get into running. As in, I'm thinking about keeping up with it and doing another race sometime. Maybe.
This is a picture of Katie and I before the race. I couldn't find Brian to give him the camera, so I don't have a picture of me crossing the finish line. You'll just have to trust me. I did it!
This event was the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure and most of the time I ran I was praying for a college friend who has battled breast cancer. It was just over a year ago that she discovered it and has since gone through surgeries and treatments. She has seen God's faithfulness through it all, and as I ran I prayed God would give her strength when she's tired and help her to keep her eyes fixed upon Him.
I prayed, too, that He would continue to give me strength when I am tired of my own struggles, that He would give me courage to keep going when I want to give up, and that He would help me remember He is running this race with me.
And even as I type I am praying the same for you, my friend.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin which so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
Hebrews 12:1-3

Guess What I Just Did??!!

I just registered for the Greater Lansing Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure.

Yep. I'm doing a 5K.

Sunday.

You may recall that I was "running" until Brian hired a replacement for Jessica, so I could start working out at Fitness Together again. Well, he hired Katie. When I went in on Tuesday morning for my first session with her, I commented how glad I was that she was his new trainer. I told her I had been running and if I wasn't careful I would probably end up doing a 5K, and maybe I would even start to like running. Ewwww!
Katie smiled and said, "Hey, I just heard about a 5K coming up this weekend. Maybe we could run in it together!?"
That's really all it took. We found out the details of the race and agreed today that we're going to run. Mind you, we're just running.
We aren't running competitively.
But I'm going to do it. I'm going to run a 5K. And I'm actually kind of excited about it.

Are You for REAL?

Yesterday I spoke for a delightful group of ladies at a MOPS meeting in Kalamazoo. (And as I was driving to the meeting, I realized it was on yesterday's date fifteen years ago that I graduated from Western Michigan University in Kalamazoo. It was amazing to reflect on how much has happened in those fifteen years!)
There is one comment a mom made during our discussion time which has stuck with me, and I want to talk about it here today. We were talking about being real with one another - admitting our failures and short-comings as mothers - and this woman said she has had a very hard time being open in this way. She needs the support of other moms who are experiencing similar trials, but she doesn't feel she can be real with the women she knows. This mom said she is part of an online Christian moms' group and she gets great support and advice from these women. She is free to "be real" with them because of the anonymity that goes with these online groups. She feels safe to admit her struggles because she doesn't really know, and will likely never meet, these women.
I think these online groups can be great, and I know many women find support, comfort, and good advice from the women who participate. Yes, there is some value in the "safety" of anonymity. But it got me to thinking...

It may be easy to be real online, but how are we doing offline???

How are we doing in real life???

Are you being real IRL?

And it isn't just the online forums. Blogging is another easy and "safe" way to be real. We can say anything we want to here. We can make each other laugh, cry, think and wonder. We can share our hearts honestly and openly and our blogging buddies can be blessed as we write.
Oh, how I love you, my blogging friends. Truly, I do. I consider you my friends though we have never met. (And I have a secret desire to speak for a moms' group in each of your towns so we can meet.) I pray for you and think of you. I am so thankful to God for the relationships we are able to form in the blogosphere.

But the body of Christ doesn't exist only online. We rub shoulders with physical people every day - at church, at home, in the neighborhood. And I wonder, are we being real with the real people around us? Are we opening our hearts and mouths to bless them, to encourage them, to motivate them, as readily as we do online?

It's something to think about.

And now I'm off to run a few errands before I go to my son's school. He's "V.I.P." this week and today my hubby and I get to be interviewed by his class and I'm staying to have lunch with him in the cafeteria. His teacher says it will be real loud, but I am looking forward to spending some real special time with my real son.

Have a blessed day!

God's Signature

More and more I am becoming convinced God has a special thing with me and the number eleven, eleven. If you don't know the story behind it, please click over to this post and read about it.
A couple of weeks ago when I met Sue from Praise and Coffee we had lunch together. She didn't have her glasses and when our checks came she held hers up and asked me to tell her what it came to. It was $11.11. I chuckled, prayed for Brian, and told Sue the story of eleven eleven.
Last week I emailed a friend from small group and she replied (knowing the significance of that number), "Cute how you sent that email at 11:11." I didn't. Her computer was an hour off, but she saw the number and emailed it to me. So, of course, I prayed for Brian again.
Recently I was in the van with the kids, and Matthew piped up, "Mom, you might want to look at the clock." I thought, What for? We aren't on a schedule. We aren't late for anything. But I looked and saw it was 11:11.
This morning I was driving and glanced at the clock at 11:11 without anyone prompting me. (Well, I guess God prompted me.)
And just moments ago I was transferring files of a couple pictures onto my computer. I waited for the transfer to take place and looked at the bottom of the screen where I saw, "Taken 02/07/08 11:11 AM." So I am thanking God for my hubby and praying He will guide him through this day.

These events are fun to think of, but what happened Sunday just tickles me. God treated us to pizza!

We went to Pizza Hut for dinner to celebrate the boys' reading accomplishments with their BookIt certificates. (That's Pizza Hut's reading incentive program. A free personal pan pizza when you reach your monthly reading goal.) We placed our order and waited. And waited. The kids complained it was taking awhile, but I really hadn't noticed.
Eventually, our waiter came and told us he had forgotten to turn in our order so we were going to be getting a 50% discount off of our bill. When he left I smiled at the kids and said, "Well, that's a nice gift from God, isn't it?"

No one will be able to convince me it wasn't a gift from God.

When our bill arrived I turned it over and started to laugh. Do you know what our discount was?
$11.11!
I showed it to Brian and he said, "God's signature!" Yeah, that combined with the BookIt certificates made our total bill come to $4.37. Not bad for dinner for a family of five. Thanks, God!

I love that concept of God's signature. It seems He is using that number to remind me of His hand at work, like a secret code between us. Though I guess it isn't so secret anymore. *grin*
May I encourage you today to keep your eyes open to the ways God is working around you and communicating His love? What a delight it is to sense His presence. Seek Him today, my friend!

Where Are You Looking?

I recently told you about a talk I am giving for a Mother's Day Luncheon next month. The point I shared was about brokenness, and how Jesus uses brokenness to make us enough. As I was spending time refining the talk this weekend, I decided I wanted to share another point with you.

Taking the five loaves and the two fish and looking up to heaven, he gave thanks and broke the loaves.
Mark 6:41a

I wonder how many times I have heard or read this account and missed what Jesus did between the taking and the breaking. Did you see where He looked?
Jesus looked to heaven - to His Father.
Oh, He has so much to teach me! I don't know about you, but when I am in the middle of an impossible situation (And wouldn't you agree feeding 5,000+ people with only five loaves of bread and two fish seems like an impossible situation?) my first reaction is to look at the circumstances and become overwhelmed. I look around at everything that needs to be done. I consider the greatness of the task and the smallness of me. The more I look at the situation, the more I get overwhelmed, and the less I think I'm going to make it through.
What if Jesus had looked around? What if He had focused on the thousands of people and the inadequate amount of food to satisfy them? What if He had agreed with His disciples that the situation was impossible, and sent them all away to get their own food?
But He didn't.
Jesus looked up.
Rather than dwelling on the situation, Jesus looked to His Father and gave thanks. He knew His Father. He knew God had the power to feed the people. And Jesus knew He just needed to look to Him.

It has taken me awhile, but I am learning to look up more often than around. I'm learning to focus my attention on my Father - Who can handle my situation, rather than on my situation - which can only frustrate me.
Psalm 91:1 says, He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. Yes, I am learning to dwell with Him and, truly, there is rest.

I know there are many who are facing impossible situations today. If you are one of those, may I ask you where you are looking?
Please follow Jesus' example and look up. Your Heavenly Father loves you and He can handle your impossible situation.

We Made It!

While I am quite sure every hour today lasted only 60 minutes, and each minute lasted only 60 seconds, there was one hour which seemed like a lifetime to me. In the midst of it, I wasn't sure if either Joshua or I would come out intact. At one point I wanted to pinch his head off, and at another time I thought I might pull out all my hair.
Joshua came home from school with an assignment which is due tomorrow, and a desire to do it right away so he could play with a particular friend. He got to work rather quickly, but the assignment was not going to be completed with as much speed. In fact, it required time and significant effort - neither of which Joshua wanted to give.
In his rush, he made some careless mistakes and became angry when I told him about the corrections he needed to make. I will spare you the details - partly because I really don't want to re-live them. Let's just say, it wasn't pretty. I honestly haven't seen Joshua that angry and upset in a very long time.
So there I was, trying to get dinner ready. Trying to help my frustrated, furious son with his report. Trying to answer my daughter's questions. Trying not to totally lose my temper and start yelling back.
I prayed, Lord, I know You are with me. I know You are here right now. Father, please help me through this moment. Please help me, Lord. I need You! And I breathed deeply.
Oh, I did a lot of deep breathing.
And I shed a few tears.

In spite of fits and yelling and crumbling paper, Joshua finally finished his assignment. In fact, once he managed to regain his self-control he completed the work rather quickly.
When he was finished I called for him to come into the kitchen with me. I hugged him and said, "We had a pretty rough time there, didn't we? But we made it through. I love you, Joshua." After how angry Joshua was with me and how frustrated I was with him, I felt it was important for us to reconcile and for me to remind him of my love. (I say this not so I will get comments about what a "good" mom I am - my level of frustration with Joshua today would clearly disqualify me from "good" mom status - but because the reconciliation was sweet, and I always want to encourage this in relationships.)
In the midst of the storm this afternoon, I honestly didn't know how we were going to make it through. But we made it. We really made it!

God is still in the business of performing miracles. *grin*

5K? No Way!...Well, Maybe

When I was in the eighth grade I was on the track team. I ran the mile and sometimes the mile relay, and I didn't like either one of them.
In fact, I didn't like running at all.
Still don't.
So can someone please tell me what is going on in my head right now???

Perhaps a little background will help.
As you may know, I have been working out with a personal trainer at my husband's studio for several months now. I have absolutely loved working out this way. (Even though it has meant getting up at 5:35 a.m.!) Though I have hardly lost any weight, my body has changed and I am definitely stronger than I was in November. Well, Jessica is getting ready to graduate and has cut way back on her hours. Since I am not a "paying client" that means I am not working out until Brian hires a replacement.
Not wanting to lose progress, I decided I would start a running regimen until said replacement is hired. We have a half-mile path near our house, so Monday morning I got up and ran that path three times. This morning I ran it four times. (And came home and did 22 unmodified push-ups!)
When I told Brian I ran the path four times, he asked me if I was going to start training for a 5K run.

I laughed.

But now I'm thinking, I don't know. Maybe I could do that.

Someone needs to save me. Quick! (OK, not Save me. Jesus already did that!) I cannot let myself turn into a r-r-r-runner. I hate running. What am I doing???

I know. I'm praying Brian's next interview with a potential trainer goes really well so I can be free of this madness. LOL

Seriously - Are you a runner? Ever trained for a long-distance event? Any tips to steer me toward or away from pursuing this crazy idea???

Every One Was Fulfilled

If you've been reading here for awhile, you are probably aware I am in the midst of a read-thru-the-Bible-in-one-year program. (And loving it!!!)

So, the other day I didn't do my daily reading, which meant I had to double up the next day. Usually that wouldn't be so bad, but at this point in time it meant I was reading six chapters which were detailing how the promised land was being split up among the tribes of Israel.

And I do mean detailing.

As in: the names of the tribes and clans; the northern, eastern, southern, and western borders; the names of all the cities within those borders; and the numbers of towns (and their pasture lands!) given to each clan.

As I read, I couldn't help but wonder why it was necessary for all this detail to be recorded in the Word of God. Maybe it would be interesting to a geography buff, but I wondered, What does this have to do with me, Lord? I trust You have a good reason for everything contained in this Book, but I am just not getting it today.

Patience, dear one. You'll see.

It wasn't until the very last verse in that day's reading, but I surely did see.

Not one of all the Lord's good promises to the house of Israel failed; every one of them was fulfilled.
Joshua 21:45

Not one of the Lord's good promises failed! And if you have any doubts, just look back over chapters 13-21.
The Reubenites got their land east of the Jordan.
Hebron went to Caleb.
Judah's eastern boundary was the Salt Sea, and the western boundary was the coastline of the Great Sea.
Beth Anath and Beth Shemesh went to Naphtali.
Joshua got the town he asked for - Timnath Serah in the hill country of Ephraim.
And everyone gave up some space for the Levites, just as the Lord had commanded through Moses.
It was as if God were saying to me, I put all these details in here because I wanted you to see that not one of all My good promises failed; every one was fulfilled.

This revelation was so compelling to me, I felt like I was thinking about it all day long. I carried Joshua 21:45 in my pocket (In fact, I still am!) and kept repeating to myself, Not one of all the Lord's good promises to the house of Israel failed; every one was fulfilled.
I felt like God was telling me to pay attention to the details and to see how He is keeping His good promises. It occurred to me that taking time to wade through the details - though it can be mundane - allows me to see God at work.

And now I'll turn it over to you, my friend. Have you been getting tired of the details? Are you wishing God would hurry up and get to the good part? Take courage in knowing not one of the Lord's good promises will fail; every one will be fulfilled.

To "Burnt Out Mom"

Dear Burnt Out Mom,
You visited this blog last night and poured your heart out in the comment section. You told me about the hard times you are going through right now and asked me to email you. I have been praying for you today and I would love to email you, too, but I do not have your email address.
I am praying you will come by here again and see this note to you. Please email me (Just click on "View my complete profile" to the right.) and I will be happy to reply to you.
For the rest of you reading, please pray that this dear woman sees this post!

Blogger Meeting

Guess what I did today???
Besides speaking for another group of precious mothers at a MOPS meeting, I got to meet Sue from Praise and Coffee! Sue and I have been corresponding for quite awhile, trying to find a time when she could come and hear me speak. Today, it worked out. *grin*
After the MOPS meeting we had lunch together. We talked about kids and mothering, blogging and writing, church and faith. I have enjoyed Sue's blog for quite some time and had no doubt I would enjoy her in person, too. I didn't realize, though, that I would feel like I was seeing an old friend as opposed to someone I have only "virtually" met before.
What a treat for me today!

Mean Mom Gets Soft

Help! I don't know what has happened to me!
This morning I made it over to Home Depot to purchase more yard waste bags so the kids and I could finish bagging up the piles that are laying on the grass. I fully intended to force ask the kids to help me, because I am a Mean Mom, you know. But something strange happened.
The kids were already outside (Eager beavers, don't you think?) but when I went out I found they were engaged in a game. I was watching a friend's kids this afternoon, and the boys and girls had joined forces for a Battle of the Sexes rendition of Capture the Flag.
They were running around, yelling and laughing, planning their strategy to take the victory and somehow I couldn't bring myself to ask them to stop. I think this post from Ann Kroeker may have influenced me...I was thinking about how good it is for them to be running around outside, having fun, and I decided, I can do this bagging myself. I should let them enjoy themselves with this game.

So I did.

Fellow Mean Moms, do you think I need help?
Could this move on my part come back to haunt me?
Will I regret being n-n-n-nice???
If you think I need to get my head checked, please, please save me before it's too late!
I think there is still hope. I hope there is still hope, anyway. I have a lot more raking to do. There are plenty of dead leaves and foliage around the yard. There will be many, many more bags to fill. The kids aren't out of the woods yet. There is still work to be done.
I can still be mean get them to help me out.

I may have gotten soft today, but it won't last forever. I promise. Mean Moms of America, I will not let you down!

Music Giveaway!

Coach J is giving away Steven Curtis Chapman's latest CD on Monday. Follow her link to read about it and enter to win.
Of course, if you enter to win, you are decreasing my chances of winning. But Jenny is a dear, dear woman and I don't want you to not go over and meet her, simply because I want to win that CD. So, perhaps you could click over to her, read through her blog, come to love her - as I have - but just not enter to win the CD, thereby refraining from reducing my chances of winning.
Perhaps.
*grin*
No, really, it's OK. My birthday is coming up. (In five months.) I can wait.

ALERT: Mean Mom Loose in Okemos, Michigan

Children in Okemos, Michigan are in the midst of spring break, enjoying a hard earned eleven day vacation. Some youngsters are being treated by their parents to exciting trips to far-away places. Others are engaging in extended play time with school friends, staying up much past usual bedtimes, and even sleeping in until noon.
Sources have learned, however, the children of Karen Hossink are not among these lucky youngsters.
Mrs. Hossink was spotted Sunday afternoon in her yard, raking several years' worth of dead foliage from once-beautiful gardens. "Mr. Small never did any garden work," said Hossink's neighbor. "He mowed the grass and that's it." Hossink just sighed and went back to work, wishing the previous owner of her home would have kept up with the yard work better.
All this yard work meant nothing to Mrs. Hossink's children Sunday. They played happily, hardly noticing the work their mother was doing. It wasn't until her trip to the grocery store Monday, and a purchase of ten yard-waste bags, that the Hossink children smelled their doom.
On this Monday afternoon, when other children on spring break were playing on warm beaches in Florida or California, were eating their fill of pizza at Chuck E. Cheeses, or were rushing down the slide at some wonderful in-door water park somewhere, the Hossink children were helping their Mean Mom stuff ten yard-waste bags full of sticks, dead leaves, and rotting foliage.

Young Matthew bailed on them early on, but Elizabeth and Joshua were troopers right up to the end. Though, the end isn't really the end. Sources say the reason Mrs. Hossink allowed her children to stop working was not because they complained of being tired, not because they were getting scraped by sticks and prickers, not because high winds made it difficult to fill the bags, but simply because they ran out of bags. More yard waste remains on the ground and sources say, when she gets back to the store to purchase more bags, Mrs. Hossink will be enlisting the help of her children to finish the job.

Although Karen Hossink has admitted to making her children work during their spring break, thereby accepting the label of Mean Mom, it is believed she is harmless to other children. Those individuals who had previously asked Mrs. Hossink to watch their children for a few hours later this week should proceed with their plans, without concern for the well-being of their precious off-spring. Mrs. Hossink promises she will abide by all applicable child labor laws from here on out.

Upright and Just is HE

How would you feel if someone asked you to do a really big task - one you thought you couldn't handle and from which you actually tried to get yourself excused - but you agreed to it after this individual convinced you he would be with you through the whole thing. So you listened to him and did everything he told you, in spite of the grumbling and complaining the people all around you were doing. You were simply doing as you were told and the people were blaming you for their misfortune. Though the going was tough, you obeyed the one who was leading you and did your best to lead the ornery, grumbling people around you. You were an upstanding person and were looking forward to the end of this journey, and the promise of goodness you had been given.
When you signed up for this adventure, you had no idea how long it would last. But because of the bad behavior of the people you were leading, the journey consumed a full third of your life. Still, you did as your leader commanded.
Except for that one time when you broke faith with him, when you did not uphold his holiness among the people you were leading. But that was only once.
What if all that happened, and your leader told you that because of that one time you dishonored him, you would not be allowed to obtain the promise he had given you at the beginning?
Would you be angry?
Would you accuse your leader of being unfair and cruel?

Moses didn't.

In fact, when this happened to Moses, he said,

He is the Rock, his works are perfect, and all his ways are just. A faithful God who does no wrong, upright and just is he.
Deuteronomy 32:4

I just finished reading the book of Deuteronomy and was drawn to the above verse because it describes God so wonderfully. I read it and thought, Yes. God is just. His works are perfect. Moses was right in saying these things. Then I considered what Moses had been through and what was going to happen to him in the coming moments, and I was even more amazed at his faith in God.
Moses had led the Israelites through the desert for 40 years, dealt with their grumbling against him, pleaded with God for them, and commanded the Israelites to do everything God had said. All this Moses did so he could lead the Israelites into the land God had promised their forefathers to give them - a land flowing with milk and honey. Then there was that one time in Numbers 20 when Moses was disobedient to the Lord - when he struck the rock, rather than speaking to it - and God said, "Because you did not trust in me enough to honor me as holy in the sight of the Israelites, you will not bring this community into the land I give them." (Numbers 20:12)

Moses reluctantly agreed to do this thing God called him to. He spent 40 years of his life leading a disobedient, grumbling community of people through the desert. He, himself, was disobedient. Once.

Yet, through it all, God was perfectly faithful and just.

Then God told Moses to come up a mountain so he could see the land the Israelites would cross the Jordan to possess - the land to which Moses had led them - but he would only be able to see it. Moses would never set foot in the promised land because, on that mountain, he would die.
And, knowing he would die without entering the promised land, Moses said, "He is the Rock, his works are perfect, and all his ways are just. A faithful God who does no wrong, upright and just is he."

Is anyone else amazed by Moses' response to God here? Does anyone else think he would have been justified in protesting, "Aw, c'mon, God. After everything I have been through, won't You just let me enter the promised land with these people?"
I have to believe it was Moses' intimate experience with God that allowed him to say, in the face of everything through which he had gone and that which was before him, He is the Rock, his works are perfect and all his ways are just. A faithful God who does no wrong, upright and just is he.
I don't know about you, but I want to experience God like that!

Whew!

Woah! I have had a whirlwind day today. I have been up since 3:30 and really feel the need to go to bed, but I wanted to share just a bit here before I go collapse. *grin*
This morning I spoke for a precious group of women and God completely blessed me through them. We shared a fair amount of laughter and tears - which is always a good thing. A couple of them had already read my book and encouraged me with reports of how God has used my story to help them. I found the woman to look at when I said, "I love you," (If you aren't familiar with the significance of that statement, you can read about it here.) and I had nice one-on-one time with the coordinator when we went out to lunch, before she took me back to the airport.
One thing I really liked about this group was the set-up of the room. The microphone had a very long cord and the tables were nicely spaced, so when I sang I moved out into the middle of the room with the women. I loved being closer to them, making more eye contact, and just having a greater sense of intimacy. I'm not sure what it is about the combination of singing and being close to the audience that I enjoy so much, but I like it when I'm the one in the audience and I like it when I'm the one presenting. (Hoping the women did, too!)
This is the first time I have done a trip so quickly. In fact, as I was driving home from the airport tonight it surprised me to realize just twelve hours earlier I was on the plane headed to Chicago to start my day. In and out, rather quickly. Whew!
I love to be able to linger a little longer, to spend more time getting to know the women to whom I am speaking, but I was so glad the details worked out so I could make this trip today - as short as it was. I know I was blessed, and I pray God will continue to minister HOPE to each of the women who were present today. If you were one of the women at MOPS today, please know I am continuing to pray for you!

Loving Jesus,

Spring Break...

So how was dinner last night? We fully enjoyed the "cake" I made for our April Fool's dinner and I thought I would post a picture of my handiwork. It smelled and tasted soooo good! Labor intensive, yes, but when my kids get that excited about dinner, when they invite their friends into the kitchen to "show me off," it is totally worth it. *BIG grin*
But I am off dinner duty for a few nights now. *BIGGER grin*
My kids start spring break tomorrow and I am going to be speaking for a MOPS group in the Chicago area. (I am flying out of Flint at 6 a.m., which means I need to be there at 5 a.m., which means I need to leave my house at 4:15 a.m., which means I need to get up at 3:30 a.m. Buying a Diet Coke with caffine will be the first order of business after I de-plane! LOL)
Anyway, since I am going to be gone, my mother-in-law is going to take the kids. We're meeting her in a couple hours to "make the switch." And, since Brian and I will be sans kids tonight, we're going out to eat! Tomorrow I will be at O'Hare for dinner, and Brian will be on his own - but he'll manage. And Friday the kids are still going to be with their grandma, so Brian and I are going out again - to a movie even!
Yes, it's April and we're finally getting around to using the gift cards we recieved at Christmas...Better late than never.
Anyway, I am fully looking forward to having a break from dinner duty. My own little spring break, I suppose.
I am praying now, as I enter into a bit of a rest (though it will be on a bit of sleep!), God will use me to pour Himself on the women at MOPS tomorrow. If you think about it, please pray for us - that God would speak through me, and the women would hear Him clearly. Thank you, my friends!

He Will Deliver!

You may recall me mentioning the read through the Bible in one year program I am following. I am currently in Deuteronomy and before I get into this post I want to say, once again, how much I love this reading program. If you have never read through God's Word completely and systematically, let me encourage you to check out the link above and get started on an incredible journey!!!

The other day I read chapter 7 and have been thinking about it quite a bit since then. Up to this point in the book Moses has been recounting for the Israelites what God has been doing for them, reminding them how they have responded to Him, and exhorting them to love God and follow His commands. Now he is telling them about how God is going to drive out the nations before them, so He may deliver them into the land which He promised their forefathers He would give them.
Usually, I try to keep my blog entries from getting too long and I don't normally quote long portions of scripture because I know you have a lot to do and probably not a lot of time to read.
Today, however, I am going to quote Deuteronomy 7:17-24 and I am going to ask you to read it thoughtfully and carefully. I believe God's Word will speak for itself, so I am only going to comment briefly about it at the end. I think this is a very encouraging piece of scripture and I don't want you to miss it.

You may say to yourselves, "These nations are stronger than we are. How can we drive them out?" But do not be afraid of them; remember well what the LORD your God did to Pharaoh and to all Egypt. You saw with your own eyes the great trials, the miraculous signs and wonders, the mighty hand and outstretched arm, with which the LORD your God brought you out. The LORD your God will do the same to all the peoples you now fear. Moreover, the LORD your God will send the hornet among them until even the survivors who hide from you have perished. Do not be terrified by them, for the LORD your God, who is among you, is a great and awesome God. The LORD your God will drive out those nations before you, little by little. You will not be allowed to eliminate them all at once, or the wild animals will multiply around you. But the LORD your God will deliver them over to you, throwing them into great confusion until they are destroyed. He will give their kings into your hand, and you will wipe out their names from under heaven. No one will be able to stand up against you; you will destroy them.

As I read this passage I was at once impressed with God's power and faithfulness - reflecting on all He had done in bringing the Israelites out of Egypt. Surely, they had no reason to fear!
But it is verse 22 which has really stuck with me. The LORD your God will drive out those nations before you, little by little. You will not be allowed to eliminate them all at once, or the wild animals will multiply around you. It isn't just His power and faithfulness which are perfect, but His wisdom, too.
I thought of several friends for whom I have been praying. There is one with a sick daughter, one with an injured daughter, another has a daughter in a far away country she is waiting to adopt, and yet another is waiting for God to open the doors to begin the adoption process. I am praying for a woman with an ill husband and a prodigal son, for a friend dealing with stresses of sickness and the delicate balance between work and family, and for a young man struggling to come out of a brain injury.
Surely, each of these individuals could say they are facing a "nation" which is much stronger than they are. I guess there is a pretty good chance you have a nation of your own which you are facing today. So we pray, and we ask God to drive out the nation, and we trust He is able to do it. But we wonder why "nothing" seems to be happening.
Could it be God is driving out your nation little by little - as He knows best?
My friend, whatever the nation is before you, which you are waiting for God to drive out, I pray you will be encouraged as you recall His faithfulness to you in the past and trust His wisdom for the present and future.

He will deliver!!!

Cake for Dinner?

It's almost April first. Do you know what's for dinner???

My kids look forward to April Fool's Day every year because I serve cake for dinner, and salad for dessert. Want to join us this year? It's fun!

For dinner, make your favorite meat loaf in two round cake pans. "Frost" and stack them just like you would a real cake, using mashed potatoes. I put some extra mashed potatoes in a pastry bag with a star tip and pipe a shell border around the bottom and top edges. Then dot the border with spots of mustard and ketchup. It really ends up looking like a cake, and the kids think it's great!

For dessert you'll need waffle ice cream bowls, ice cream, flaked coconut, green and yellow food coloring, whipped topping, black rope licorice - cut into 1/4-inch slices, and maraschino cherries. Scoop the ice cream into the waffle bowls. In separate resealable plastic bags, combine about a teaspoon of water with several drops of the food coloring; add coconut to each bag. Seal the bag and shake to tint.
Sprinkle the ice cream with the green coconut. Dollop with whipped topping. Sprinkle with the yellow coconut and licorice; top with the cherries.
And voila! Taco salads for dessert!

Of course, you'll also want something to "drink"...For six servings, prepare 2 packages (3 ounces, each) of strawberry gelatin. Refrigerate until partially set, about 2 hours. Stir in 3/4 cup each, sliced fresh strawberries, fresh raspberries, and fresh blueberries. Pour into six tall drink or soda glasses. Insert a straw into each glass. Refrigerate until set. They'll look like wonderful drinks, but your family will be in for a surprise when they try to sip it up. Ha!

So now you know what we're eating next Tuesday. How about you? Will you serve cake for dinner???

Romance Through E-mail???

I have mentioned before about Maria at Free to Fly and her celebration of The Year of Romance. As a part of her blog she is posting monthly about marriage (Follow the previous link to read the details...) and is encouraging other bloggers to do the same. I believe, for those of us who are married, a healthy relationship with our hubby is crucial to surviving motherhood. With that in mind - and finding myself encouraged by Maria's Year of Romance - today I am going to share with you a little something that happened yesterday...

Brian and I were in separate rooms working on our computers. The kids were busy entertaining themselves and I was getting some work done when my computer chimed at me, alerting me of a new email.
The message was from Brian (who was less than twenty feet away from me) and the content was a bit of a proposition. I didn't say anything. I simply hit Reply and responded in kind. After a bit of playful banter back and forth over cyberspace, I excused myself from the computer and went to my room. Brian did, too. And the rest, quite honestly, is none of your business!!! *grin*

My point in sharing this story is to encourage those of you who are married to remember to have fun with your husband. The kids, the laundry, the cooking, the cleaning, blah, blah, blah, take up so much of our time and wear us out so we often have nothing left to give to the one with whom it all started!
At least for me, at the end of a long day, going to bed - to go to sleep - is my main interest. I have a feeling the same is true for a majority of you reading these words. Sooooo, let me encourage you - in the middle of the day, when your kids are happily occupied and your hubby is around - to surprise him with some playful banter and maybe an afternoon rendezvous.
If he's at his computer, send him an e-mail.
If he's wroking around the house, slip a note into his hand.
If he's outside, call him on his cell phone.
However you do it, have fun. He'll love it. And I am quite sure you will, too!

Brokenness? I Can Live Up to That!

I think we have already established here at Surviving Motherhood that I am not perfect. This confession should come as a surprise to no one who is even a semi-regular reader of this blog.
And I am glad to know the women who leave comments are on the same page as me when it comes to imperfection. (I'm trusting those who do not comment are in agreement, too, but I'll never know unless you tell me. hint, hint *big grin*)

As I mentioned last week, I am writing a talk which I will be giving to a group of women at a Mother's Day Luncheon in Florida. Part of my talk will be addressing an issue with which I think many of us struggle - be it in motherhood, or any other aspect of our lives - and I want to share just a bit of that with you here today.
The talk I am going to present comes from Mark 6:30-44, when Jesus fed five thousand men (plus all the women and kids!!!) with five loaves of bread and two fish.
The specific thing I want to address today is what Jesus did to the bread in order to make it "enough."
Clearly, the bread - as it was when the disciples gave it to Jesus - was not enough to feed the hungry crowd. There is no way 1,000+ people were going to gather around a loaf of bread and all eat of it. Not gonna happen! Jesus had to do something to it first.
So He took the bread and after giving thanks, He broke it. And somehow, in the breaking of the bread, the power of God came in and made it enough. Every person seated on that hillside ate and was satisfied, and there were twelve baskets full of left over pieces. Is that not amazing???

The thing that really spoke to me when I was studying this passage was Jesus' ability to take something which didn't seem to be anywhere near adequate, and make it enough.
And I realized that is exactly what He does with me.
Jesus takes me into His hands, breaks me, and makes me enough.
Enough of a mother.
Enough of a wife.
Enough of a friend.
Enough of a sister.
Enough of a daughter.
Enough.
Because, do you know what happens when I come face-to-face with my brokenness? I come face-to-face with the reality that I, on my own, am not enough. I am not strong enough, wise enough, experienced enough, charming enough, or capable enough. I cannot do any of this life on my own.
In the face of my brokenness I recognize my imperfection and my complete desperation for God. I am reminded of the Truth that I can do nothing without Him, but with Him - and by His grace alone - I can do anything.
As I admit my need, and relinquish myself to God's power - through my brokenness - He makes me enough. And I have found brokenness is such a good place to be, because when I am there, I am in His hands.
Perfection? That is not gonna happen this side of heaven.
But brokenness? I can live up to that!

Being Blessed Was NOT My Intention

Some of you know I have written something I call the Irritable Mother's Survival Kit, and moms who visit my website can sign up to receive the Kit and my newsletter. In order to send out these items, I had to buy a service which allows me to do mass mailings. Yesterday I logged into my account just to check on some things.
As I was looking over the names of these women, God prompted me to pray for them. So I spent the next hour or so praying for each one by name. Many of them are women I know personally, or with whom I have interacted over email, so I knew specific things to pray for them and I brought those things to God. I thanked God because He is fully aware of the needs of each woman and I asked Him to meet those needs. I asked Him to make His presence clear to these women and to cover each one with His love. And I prayed Paul's Ephesians prayer for them - as I do for you now: I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge - that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
It simply delighted my heart to consider God knows and loves us all. And though most of the women I prayed for were familiar to me by name only, it brought me joy to realize God is intimately interested in each one.
Sitting at my table, looking at my computer screen, praying for His daughters, I became aware I was a part of something way bigger than I could really understand. I was truly blessed to pray for my sisters, and being blessed was NOT my intention.
After I finished praying I sent a message to all of the women for whom I had just prayed, telling them what I had done. In the hours that followed, God really began blessing me.
My inbox started filling with emails from women thanking me for praying for them. They told me how much they needed to be prayed for yesterday. Many of them shared specific requests and I prayed for them again. They told me of the ways they experienced God's protection and comfort yesterday and I sat here thanking Jesus, nearly crying because He is so good!
God knows what we need. He knew these women needed to be lifted up yesterday and He moved in me to pray for them. He was even perfect in the timing for when my message was delivered to their inboxes.
My desire was simply to pray, but God poured out blessing on me as He allowed me a glimpse of His goodness and power. And I am so thankful.
Praying that today, you will draw near to Him and experience the blessing of His love and presence.

Leviticus 26, a la Motherhood

Two months ago I began a Read through the Bible in one year program, and I recently finished Leviticus. As I was reading chapter 26, I couldn't help but wonder what it would sound like to tweak the chapter just a bit to put it in my voice. What do you think? (BTW, to get the full effect, I would suggest grabbing your Bible and reading God's words first!)

Leviticus 26, a la Motherhood

Reward for Obedience
Do not make messes or set up forts which you are unwilling to clean up later. I am your mother.
Observe my rules and have reverence for my house (which I work so hard to keep clean in spite of you). I am the Mom.
If you follow my rules and are careful to do what I say, I will send clean clothing to your room in its season. I will wash your dirty underwear, fold your socks and even put them away for you. Your outfits will always smell nice.
I will grant peace in your land. Your brother and sister will not be allowed to torment you. You will enjoy safety among them and I will make sure they give you fair time on the Wii.
I will look on you with favor and will prepare your favorite dinners. When I go shopping I will look for sales on the snacks you love, and I will buy them for you. If I can find the fleece lined jeans you love, in your size and on sale, I will buy them and they will be yours. All yours - for you to enjoy until you wear holes in the knees which are unmendable. Even then, I will try to fix them for you.
I will put my dwelling place among you. I will walk with you to the bus stop and be your mom and you will be my child. I am the Mom who brought you out of my womb so that you would no longer stomp on my bladder; I supplied you with shoes and helped you learn to walk with your head held high.

Punishment for Disobedience
But if you will not listen to me and do as I say, and if you reject my rules and do not do exactly as I tell you to do, then I will do this to you:
I will raise my voice and tell you one more time the command I expect you to follow. I will pause for just a moment to allow you to think about your next move, but I will look at you with stern eyes.
If after this you will not listen to me, I will punish you for your sins. I will take away your computer privileges and your time on the Wii for two days. I will not allow you to go on Webkinz to do your Daily Kinz Care or to play the Wheel of Wow. For two days you will not be able to play Tanks or Super Mario Bros. no matter how much you beg and whine.
If you remain hostile toward me and refuse to listen to me, I will multiply your afflictions. I will take away computer and Wii privileges from you for four more days and you will not be allowed to participate in Movie Night on Friday. You will sit in your room and smell the popcorn, but you will not be allowed to eat any of it. While the rest of us enjoy whatever comes from Netflix this week, you will sit in your room, alone and without popcorn.
If in spite of these things you do not accept my correction but continue to be hostile toward me, I myself will be hostile toward you. I will make you clean the entire bathroom by yourself, and I will not help you. I will still wash your clothes, but I will not fold them. You must do that yourself. No longer will I prepare your favorite meals. You will eat brussel sprouts and spinach. And you'll like it! In my anger I will unplug the Wii and remove it from the house completely.
But if you will confess your sins - your treachery against me and your hostility toward me - then when your heart is humbled and you apologize to me, I will remember the covenant I made with God at your birth. I will remember the promise I made to Him to love and care for you and to be your mother.
When you have calmed down and will listen to me I will talk with you about your behavior. By the grace of God alone, I will love you and I will remind you it is my job to train you in the ways that are right. I will explain to you once more that when I punish you, it is for your good, to mold and shape you - not to discourage you. I will repeat to you that everything I do for you is because I love you.
I will remember I am a broken woman, in need of God's grace and mercy - just as much as you are an immature child, in need of my grace and mercy. I will confess my own sin to the Lord and beg of Him to carry me through these difficult moments of mothering.
I will fold your clothes and pray for you.
I will make your favorite dinner and thank God for you.
I will play you in a game of Tanks and laugh with you.
I will thank God for His presence with me and His perfect faithfulness.
I am the Mom.

Practically Perfect in Every Way???

Did you think of Mary Poppins when you read the title of this post? Remember when she took out her special tape measure to size up Michael and Jane, and the tape told her about their personalities and quirks? And when she measured herself, it said, "Mary Poppins. Practically perfect in every way."
Ahem. Just because she was, does that mean we need to be?

Let's shed a little light on Miss Poppins' situation, shall we?

Do you realize she didn't cook? Did you ever see her doing the laundry? I didn't! And when she did clean, all she did was sing a song and snap her fingers, and the toys put themselves away! Mary Poppins didn't have a husband to attend to, and she got paid to be nice to those kids!!!
Is anyone reading these words living under the same conditions as Miss Practically Perfect?
No? Me neither. So let's put away the notion that we need to be perfect, OK?

I realize last week a wrote another post about our need to receive grace as mothers, but I am willing to risk the possibility that some of you will begrudge the redundancy, because the need just keeps surfacing.
Yesterday I met with a dear friend with whom I am in a mentoring relationship. She has recently had her first baby and we spent much of our time yesterday talking about how hard this phase is. My friend has been concerned about various things common to first-time moms, and now her husband is putting in a lot of hours at work and school - leaving her feeling rather alone. She told me she wants to support him and be there for him at the end of the day, but she is just so tired all she really wants to do is go to sleep.
I know many of you can relate to my friend. You want to make sure the children are healthy and safe. You want to do everything you can to stimulate their minds and bodies to develop and grow strong. It would be nice if you could maintain the house in some semblance of order. Meals need to be prepared and there is laundry to do. Perhaps you even have a goal of ironing your husband's shirts. And you might also have in mind to preserve all your children's memories in a fancy scrapbook!
I reviewed all the things going on in my friend's life and asked her (as I am asking you), "Is it any wonder you're worn out? You need to take it easy on yourself."
It seems we moms think the world might fall apart if we don't see to it that everything is taken care of and in order.
Guess what??!!
Someone Else has taken on the job of holding the universe together in perfect balance. He has been doing it since the beginning of time and He doesn't need our help.
Will you join me in realizing life will go on even if I am/you are two years "behind" on the scrapbook? Will you take a deep breath with me and accept the fact that a small hole in my/your son's jeans isn't going to stop the world from turning? Will you concur with me on the understanding that the family isn't going to starve because I/you burnt the muffins?
Yes, I want to be the best I can be as a wife and mother. I hope you do, too. But we aren't, nor will we ever be, practically perfect in every way.
I recently read a quote by Michael J. Fox which went something like this, "I will strive for excellence, but perfection - I'll leave that up to God."
Yeah, I'm with Michael. How about you?

BTW, I am in the process of writing a talk which addresses an issue many of us face regarding our imperfect-ness. That is, doubting we can ever be "enough" for our children and family. Stay tuned - I may share some of those thoughts here someday!

Not an Inconvenience

A couple months ago I updated you on the progress of my next book, which I have now decided to call, Finding Joy: More Confessions of an Irritable Mother. I told you of the decision I had made to cut a few of the devotions (to satisfy my Type-A personality tendencies, so I could divide the book into four "one week" sections) and also the decision to post the "cut" entries here (to further satisfy my Type-A personality...no need to waste what I have worked on so hard! *grin*).

So today I give you...

Not an Inconvenience

I had my plans. I had just picked up the van from the repair shop and was on my way to run some errands. By myself. It is always enjoyable to run errands when I can do it without kids in tow, asking for this or that toy, needing to go to the bathroom, or complaining about the “quick errand” taking too long. Perhaps when I was finished I would do some window shopping, bargain hunting, or just go to a coffee shop and enjoy one of their wonderful no-bake cookies. I had not worked out all the details – I just knew I was going to get my errands done and enjoy the afternoon, by myself, at a leisurely pace.
Just as I was pulling into the parking lot of my first destination, my phone rang. The caller ID told me it was someone from school calling. Because I was not expecting to hear from anyone at school, I figured this call was not a good one. Reluctantly, I answered the phone.
The school secretary told me Joshua was in the office and wanted to talk to me. He told me he had a headache, and when I asked what he wanted me to do, Joshua said he wanted me to pick him up from school and bring him home. I would like to say I immediately switched over to saintly mother mode and sped out of the parking lot to rescue my hurting child and nurse him back to health. But that would be a lie.
Instead, I started arguing with myself. Awww, how am I going to get my shopping done? Can I take him with me? He won’t want to run errands. Do I go ahead and complete my errands now and make him wait at school? Why does he have to have a headache? Do I really need to go get him? What ever happened to, “Just put your head down on your desk. You’ll feel better in a little while.”? This interruption is ruining my plans today!
I sat in the parking lot for a minute contemplating what to do next. I had told Joshua I would come and pick him up. Should I just run into the store real quick, since I was already there, and take care of my shopping before I fulfilled my word? Technically, I had not said I would come right now to pick him up. Maybe Joshua would not even notice if it took me fifteen to twenty minutes longer to get to school than it should. Perhaps I could get some of my errands completed before my afternoon plans were totally interrupted.
Or, perhaps not.
Before long, duty and responsibility won out and I begrudgingly drove out of the parking lot to pick my son up.
As I was driving to school, trying not to be mad at Joshua for having a headache and ruining my plans, it occurred to me God never sees me as an interruption. When I come to Him with my needs, God never feels “put out” or inconvenienced. He never looks at me and says, Oh, Karen. I had other plans today. I was going to bring a few babies into the world. There is a hungry mother looking for food for her children, who really needs my attention. I wanted to paint a beautiful sunset for someone to watch tonight. And after I’m finished, I thought I would like to just sit back and watch the stars for awhile. This really is not a good time. Could you try Me again tomorrow? In fact, He wants me to come to Him when I’m not feeling well, when I am troubled, when I need to ask for His help, and when I just need comforting.
Is there something weighing you down today, which you have neglected to bring to the Lord’s feet because you did not want to bother Him with it? Were you thinking He had better things to do than listen to your little problems? Did you want to avoid inconveniencing God or interrupting His other plans for the day?
Give Him your burdens, my friend. He loves you and He wants to carry them for you. Don’t worry. He can handle it!

Your Turn:
Do you sometimes feel like a burden to God, like you’re inconveniencing Him by telling Him your problems? Read 1 Peter 5:6-7. Based upon this scripture, do you think God wants to hear your problems, or wants you to keep them to yourself?
Spend some time in prayer unpacking your burdens with God. Give them to Him, and leave them with Him. Really. Picture yourself opening a suitcase and removing the burdens, giving them to the Lord. Don’t put them back in! Then just sit and imagine yourself resting in the lap of your Heavenly Father who loves you so much. Thank God because He cares for you.

Truthfully, I didn't want to cut this entry, because I like the Your Turn section so much. But I had my reasons...Anyway, I hope you will take time with God to go through it!

You're a Good Mom!!!

This morning I spoke for a MOPS group and, in addition to the fun of seeing a friend from college - whom I haven't seen for 15 years! - I enjoyed my interaction with the women in attendance.
After I finished speaking, I joined one of the discussion groups to talk about the ideas I had presented and we had some great conversation. There was one topic that came up, which I want to share with you here.
One of the women at the table said she could really relate to me when I shared about the time in my life when I thought every other mom in my MOPS group had it all "together." When I thought I was the only one who struggled - the only one who wasn't perfect.
I spent too many years feeling that way, hiding the truth about who I was and the fact that I was struggling. Those were not good years, and I was glad to hear this woman say she realizes she is not alone in her struggle. We all agreed we need each other for support.
As we talked about the fact that our kids generally think we are "good moms," we also agreed it isn't our kids who are holding the standard of perfection over our heads. No, that high ridiculous standard is one we put out there for ourselves.
Honestly, think about it.
Though your kids might compare you to "Timmy's mom" who lets him have candy for breakfast, watch TV for five hours every day, never makes him take a bath, and gives him ice cream whenever he wants it, when was the last time they compared you to Mary Poppins, Carol Brady, or June Cleaver? When was the last time one of them said to you, "Mom, you need to try harder. You simply are not measuring up to my standards." They want "fair" (and I could spend a few posts talking about "fair"...but not today!) not perfection. I don't think our kids have the same unrealistic standards for us as moms as we hold over ourselves, and I am willing to bet - if you asked your children - they would tell you they think you are a good mom.
While each of the moms with whom I was having this discussion agreed with our assessment, one mom said, "Still, it's nice to hear every now and then that you're doing a good job."
Everyone agreed with that sentiment.
So, Mom...because I know you love your children, because I believe you are doing your best - even though you aren't perfect, because your kids love you and need you and you are caring for them by the grace of God, please recieve these words from my heart to yours: You're a good mom!!!

Resist the voice in your head which would say, But, Karen, you don't know how upset I got with them last night. You don't know how selfish I have been this week. You don't know the foul attitude in my heart some days...
Yeah, but I know my heart. And I know my Savior. I know He offers second chances and new beginnings. And I know, by His grace, each one of us can be a good mom. So, please receive His grace today - and go love those kids!!!

A Heart Assessment

Have you ever visited Rachel at A Heart Assessment? I don't remember how we first became acquainted, but we have had some great conversations via email and I consider her my friend. So I trust she won't mind that I am borrowing her blog title for my post title. (By the way, her dad needs our prayers right now. Click over to her site for the details.)

A Heart Assessment.

That's exactly what I had to go through last night.

On Sunday nights Brian and I have small group at our house. We've been doing this for years and, when we began, the timing all made sense. The kids were always in bed by 8:00, so that's what time everyone gathered at our house for small group. Sometimes we were a little "late" getting downstairs, but the kids were in bed, everyone was happy and it all worked out very well.
Fast forward to the past month or two.
Our kids are older now. Their new school starts later than the previous one, so they don't need to get up as early in the morning. Therefore, bedtime is no longer 8:00. But small group still is.
We have adjusted our timing and expectations of the kids and their bedtime to work with our Sunday nights, but recently there has arisen a problem. Joshua has decided he just "can't" go to sleep if I don't come in, sing to him, and say goodnight right before he has to go to sleep. In other words, I can't sing and say goodnight at 7:45 and then let him stay up until 8:30, or whenever he wants to go to bed. It just won't work for him.
I have tried to tell Joshua it is rude for me to leave my guests in the middle of our meeting to go in and say goodnight to him. I told him if he wants me to go through the regular bedtime drill, he will need to be in bed by 8:00 on Sundays. He hasn't been too crazy about this option, but last night he was ready for bed before 8:00 and I tucked him in before small group began.
Everything seemed to be going smoothly, and I was relieved.
About 8:45 or so, Joshua came into the family room with a very sad look on his face and mumbled something about not being able to sleep. He asked if I would come say good night to him again. I could see he was on the verge of tears and I got up to go back to his room with him. When we got there, Joshua climbed into bed and said he was sorry.
Sorry? For what? Because he was having trouble falling asleep?
Why should he be sorry for that???

That's when the heart assessment began.

I realized Joshua was apologizing for asking me to leave small group to come and say good night again. He didn't want to "inconvience" me or my guests. I could tell he thought he was bothering me, and he felt sorry for that.
Oh, how I wanted to cry!
This was my sweet little boy, needing his mommy, yet afriad I was going to be upset by his neediness. The moment caused me to come face-to-face with my sinful nature. My selfishness.
What had I told him before? I didn't want to be rude to my guests by saying goodnight to him in the middle of small group. Was that it?
No, last night I realized the truth. My small group members are my friends. They don't care if I get up to attend to my children. They expect it - I'm a mom!
The truth of the matter is, I didn't want to be bothered. I was allowing my selfishness to speak for me and pin it on not wanting to be rude, but that wasn't the truth at all. And Joshua's simple, Sorry, made me see the truth.

I love my children. I do not ever want them to think they are a bother or an inconvenience to me. They are gifts from God, and I want them to know I believe it. My battle with selfishness and self-centeredness is likely to be life-long, but I thank God for taking me through this heart assessment and allowing me to see what's really there.
My prayer today is from one of my favorite choruses: Change my heart, O God. May I be like You!

Free to Fly Award!

She has done it again!
Maria over at Free to Fly has blessed me - not just with an award, but with great encouragement. She has created her own award to give out and has absolutely captured my heart's desire in her post about why she is giving it. (Click over and read it. I am sure you will be uplifted, too!)
The struggle.
The growth.
The beauty.
The encouragement.
It is what I am experiencing and it is what I want to share with everyone who reads this blog. Thank you, Maria, for seeing it in me and for encouraging me with your words and prayers.

Is it Inevitable?

Bedtime last night was sweet, and it made me wonder if it is inevitable that one day my kids will be “too grown up” for their mother’s love. Is there something automatic about adolescence that makes a kid not want their mom to give them time and affection? Does it have to be???

Because I would be happy to continue nights like last night for a very long time.
I started in Joshua’s room. He was tired and hoped he wouldn’t have trouble falling asleep like he did the night before. We talked for a minute about going to sleep and agreed on a strategy for how to get the rest we need. (I told him I always pray when I am having trouble sleeping. For a minute I thought, He’s probably going to think, "Man, she prays about everything!" Then I figured – Well, I do pray about everything. And I want him to know it!) I sang to Joshua and rubbed his hair, then kissed him goodnight. As I was leaving his room we spoke our “I love you”s and went through our usual banter about who rocks.
Joshua said, “You rock!”
I replied, “You rock more!”
He came back with, “I know I rock, but you rock more than I do.”
I said, “You rock more than I ever will!”
And so it goes every night. Even if we have had some rough times getting ready for bed, we always end the night with a song, I love you, and You rock!

Then I moved to Matthew’s room. I sang a song, as usual, then Matthew rolled over onto his tummy and was raising his arm up behind him, looking as if he were grasping for something. He looked very awkward in this position and I kept asking what he was doing. Since his face was in his pillow, I was having a hard time understanding him and I leaned closer to hear him better. It was then I heard him say, "I want to hug you." I thought, Then why don't you roll over on your back so it will be easier, but instead of voicing my thoughts, I leaned closer still so he could wrap his arm around my neck.
And as I kneeled by Matthew's bed, held closely by his arm, I prayed for him. I knew he was also praying for me (You may read the story behind these prayers here, if you wish.) and I simply loved him in that moment. After a couple minutes we both said, "Amen," I kissed Matthew, and said goodnight.

Finally, it was Elizabeth's turn. We usually tease each other a little before I sing her song, and last night was no different. So we giggled and then I sang. It was while I was singing that I began to wonder if it is inevitable that a teenager doesn't want her mom around.
I looked at Elizabeth, almost 12 years old, and recalled a conversation we had recently. I had been in her school that day to listen to kids practice oral presentations. Elizabeth's teacher asked which group I wanted to start with and Elizabeth ran over to me saying, "Mine!" Her teacher chuckled and said something to the effect of, "Enjoy that while it lasts!"
That night as I was saying goodnight to her, Elizabeth asked me, "Mom, why do some kids not want their parents to be with them?" I smiled at her and, instead of listing the reasons I thought other teens would give - thereby planting ideas in her head, I just said, "I have no idea." Elizabeth went on to share her own ideas and told me she thought I was a good mom, and always wants me to be around.

I don't imagine Elizabeth is going to be calling me from college when she goes to bed, asking me to sing her a song. I'll worry about her if she does!
But I wonder, I hope, I even pray my girl and my boys will never get "too big" for their mother's love.