I imagine you were as devastated Monday as I was when you heard of Robin Williams' death. So many thoughts running through my head. Questions. Memories. More questions. I didn't know Mr. Williams had battled depression. I mean, who woulda thunk it? He was always smiling, laughing, being fun and funny. How could there be a depressed bone in his body?
Top Ten Things About Sending Your Daughter to College
I saw post with a title like this last year and decided to save it for my own encouragement - knowing "my day" was coming. And, since Elizabeth is leaving for college today, I decided to re-read the list - and write one of my own.So, here it is: *cricket* *cricket* That is, I got nothin'. I can't think of a single "Top" thing about sending my daughter to college. *I'm going to miss her. *I'll be the only girl in the family now. *Dinner table conversation is going to be AWKWARD. To read the rest, please visit me over at Amanda's.
I almost went into panic mode last week.
We have just come up on the end of the term for our cell phone contracts, so Brian ordered new phones for the entire family. And (almost) everyone has been so excited about them. Josh's phone broke a few months ago, so he has been using an old one. Elizabeth's went ka-put recently, so she's been using her hold one. Brian keeps moaning about his battery wearing out too quickly, this and that button not functioning properly, and something else I can't recall at the moment - always following up the complaint with an I-need-a-new-phone-statement. And Matthew? Well, he just likes new shiny things. So, why was I ready to panic? It's simple, really. I didn't want a new phone. After two years of using my current phone, I am feeling quite comfortable with it. (Although I still forget that it automatically capitalizes the first letter of a sentence when I'm texting. SO I OFTEN END UP PRESSING 'SHIFT' AND TYPING IN ALL CAPS. Then I have to delete every letter and start over again. But I'm getting better. *ahem*) Besides, my phone wasn't broken in any way. But we decided to order me a new one, figuring my current phone might not last another two years... So, anyway, the panic. On Thursday, the phones all arrived and the kids quickly opened the box, found their phones, and began to activate and program and personalize and whatever-else-you-need-to-do-to-a-new-phone. I heard lots of new ring-tones - which was fun. But Elizabeth got frustrated because she was having trouble with the activation. Then, she couldn't transfer all of her contacts. And she lost her pictures. Matthew was upset because some of the icons were in different locations on his new phone, and he wished they hadn't changed. I sat there thinking, If the kids are having this much trouble getting their phones in working order, how am I going to manage mine? I don't even want to attempt it. Wonder if I can get Brian to do it for me. I *might* have started feeling light-headed. But then I remembered something which calmed me down. (And it wasn't a Bible verse reminding me that nothing is too difficult for God.) I remembered my phone isn't broken. So I don't need to use this new one right now. I can put it safely away in my closet and let it sit there until I have to use it. And maybe by that time I will have gained enough technical confidence to face activating and programming all by myself. Yeah. I doubt it, too.
Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.
Sometimes that Murphy's Law thing drives me nuts. *Why is it that when I forget to buy eggs, someone decides to have an egg sandwich - so that ONE egg I needed for a recipe is gone? *Why must rain fall only on the days when there is no umbrella in my van?*And tell me why, oh, why do people call me during church ONLY on the days when I forget to silence my phone? I'm telling you, Murphy and I are NOT good friends. His stupid Law has bitten me about a hundred times too many. But this week? It made me laugh. We were working on a craft at Edgewood which required an iron and ironing board. And since three are better than one when it comes to getting things done, Shelly and I both brought our ironing boards and irons from home - to add to the one already at work. Monday afternoon, taking into consideration how much ironing we had left to do, Shelly asked me if I would be willing to keep my ironing board at Edgewood to use again Tuesday. "Sure," I said. "It isn't like we ever use it at home!" And we shared a knowing laugh. Then, Tuesday morning as I sat eating my breakfast Brian walked into the kitchen and asked, "Hey, where is the ironing board?"I think I spat my cereal back into my bowl before I looked at him and groaned, "REALLY???"I simply could not believe my husband was asking for the ironing board. I couldn't remember the last time I saw him ironing, and on the ONE day the ironing board was missing, he wanted to use it? REALLY??? I broke the news to Brian - that he couldn't iron Tuesday morning - and explained the reason why. We looked at each other and just laughed. Muprhy's Law is the only way we could explain our little situation. Fortunately, this time his stupid Law was laughable. But, be careful because you never know when he'll strike again. *wink* Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.
Disclaimer: The ideas and opinions expressed in this post are my own, and may not necessarily reflect those of Vista Springs Living Centers.
As a general rule, I am not a fan of doing my kids' chores. I mean, the jobs belong to them. I do enough other work around the house - and at work(!) - and really do not need to be doing their chores. Can I get a hearty mommy-amen?!
However, there are occasions when I am willing to break my own rules. Like Tuesday night. I got home late from work and as I was on my way out the door after dinner to run an errand, I reminded Matthew of a chore which still needed completing. When I got home from the errand, I saw the chore was still undone. And I was ready to chastise Matthew when I entered the house. However, he was washing the dishes. (Elizabeth's chore - but she was at work.) So I remained silent about the matter. Thinking, surely he would have it completed when I returned from the next errand I had to run. Except, when I returned from my second task that evening the trash and recycling containers were still by the road. And when I entered the house again, Matthew was still washing the dishes. Specifically, he was about to undertake cleaning the grate from the grill and seemed overwhelmed by the size of the job. (I am NOT a fan of that chore, either!) But he took the task outside and got to work. At that point, I decided to bring the trash and recycling containers in for him. Honestly, it really is a minor task, yet I wanted to do something to help. Something to remind Matthew that he isn't alone. So I went outside and started to wheel the trash container to the garage. Matthew looked up from the grate he was scrubbing and called, "Thank you!" The smile on his face was delightful to me. And I knew my mission had been accomplished. My boy felt helped. And my heart was happy.
Endless amounts. That's how much.
And I, for one, am forever thankful. Between the yellow car prayers, the mat-carrying prayers, needs which are shared on Facebook, personal requests, and on-going concerns I have been spending a lot of time praying. Sometimes I remember a need which was shared with me weeks ago, and I bring it to God. And some requests are almost automatic - rolling off my tongue as easily as I breathe. Monday morning as I was praying for my mat-friends and my Facebook friends, I was struck one more time by God's faithfulness and power. I "remembered" a request which I'd previously forgotten, and I thanked God that the need had never left His mind. And as I contemplated my inability to really DO anything for these friends, I thanked God for His un-ending ability to DO everything for them. It's amazing when you really think about it - God's ability to see and know and do all things. Sometimes I feel like I'm asking so much, bringing too many needs before Him. Occasionally I wonder if I am over-loading the stores of heaven with too many prayers. But then my Father graciously reminds me just how much HE can handle. So I return to my knees (Well, unless I'm driving...) and thank God for His power and faithfulness as I lay more needs at His feet. Is there some way I can pray for you today?
Dear Lovely Young Lady, I am so thrilled you have decided to marry my Josh. Er, I'll really work on putting an end to calling him "mine". He has chosen you, and I will honor both of you in that choice. But, before you speak your vows and make the marriage final, I feel obligated to give you full disclosure regarding what you are getting yourself into. I know. Josh is charming. He's funny. He's handsome. I'm sure you think staring into his gorgeous blue eyes is the best way for you to spend the rest of your life. You love him. I get that! But, dear young lady, I would not be a good mother-in-law if I didn't tell you everything I know. I must be honest with you! Before Josh met you, long before he knew the feelings and desire he has for you were possible, he committed himself to another love. I remember one night when Josh was 16 years old and we sat around the dinner table listening to him talk about this love of his. He had spent years caring for this creature and thought about it almost constantly. Never would a day go by when Josh didn't speak of his devotion to his love. In fact, that night around the dinner table Josh figured he would be with this love of his for the next fifty or sixty years. And he was serious! This turtle has a long future with Josh. And you, if you choose to accept it.I hope this isn't coming as a shock to you, but I feel you really must know the truth. His love for this creature has been growing for so many years, and I really don't think he'll be willing to give it up. That's why I wanted you to know. Before it's too late.
Sweetheart, I know strong feelings of love have a way of keeping us from seeing clearly sometimes, and the words I'm typing here might not be convincing you of Josh's devotion to his other love. So, I feel I must also include pictures. It is for your good, dear. Please don't be angry with me. But you must understand my son's behavior before you commit to him in marriage. You see, he does things like this:
You don't have to be sturdy to carry a friend.
I have said it before, but I'm going to say it again. And I'm sure this won't be the last time: I love, LOVE the Bible study group I meet with weekly at Edgewood. I LOVE THEM!!! This week, we looked at Mark 2:1-12. This passage recounts the time when four men brought their paralyzed friend to see Jesus. But the crowd was so great around the house where Jesus was speaking that the men had to take their friend up on the roof, dig a hole in the roof, and lower their friend on his mat down to where Jesus was standing. We read and discussed the text, trying to gain an understanding of what was happening. We talked about the things in our lives which leave us feeling paralyzed - like we can't make any movement to change the situation. And we spent time praying, asking God to help us. And then... Then the most beautiful thing happened. We remembered the friends who need us to carry them. *The one who was in surgery, having cancer removed at the very moment we were meeting. *One who is in a re-hab facility. Not doing well. *Another who is facing some struggles we really don't know about. *And a sweet couple who is living with the challenges of life-after-a-stroke. Where one cannot communicate, and the other is trying desperately to understand. And although I sat there with my eyes closed and I couldn't see anyone, I heard the voices of men and women praying earnestly for one another. I sat in a room full of men and women who often have trouble walking, whose arthritis sometimes leaves their hands un-usable, and many of whom cannot safely pick up something weighing more than five pounds. And I witnessed them - together - carrying four of their friends on a mat to Jesus. It still makes me smile to think about that fellowship. That community. Where I realized we (I count myself among them, even though I don't live at Edgewood.) are more than just a community of people who live in the same building. We are a community of Believers who have the opportunity and responsibility to carry one another to Jesus. And as I gazed at the walkers, and canes, and wheelchairs around the room, I realized another important lesson: You don't have to be sturdy to carry a friend.
Disclaimer: The ideas and opinions expressed in this post are my own, and may not necessarily reflect those of Vista Springs Living Centers.
...er, maybe it isn't the "first". I mean, I've already been through her last day of kindergarten, and her last day of middle school, and her last day of high school. And her last prom. And her last first job. Annnnd her last experience as a camper at summer camp. So, I suppose what lies ahead would more appropriately be called a "new" last. But it feels like a "first" to me, because we are entering new territory. And, besides, I like the word play.
First last. So, that's what it is. This coming Sunday is when it will happen: the last time Elizabeth and I will be serving in Sunday school together before she leaves for college. Because the following Sunday we'll be visiting my parents, and the Sunday after that? She'll be in Wheaton. *sigh* I've known the day is coming. Goodness, for eighteen years I've known the day is coming! But now it is less than two weeks away, and the impending good-bye - along with the significant change it will bring to our lives - has become undeniable. I am still going to be her mom. I am still going to love her and care for her, and offer her guidance whenever she needs it. I am still going to be her most faithful prayer warrior. None of that will change. Ever. But many things will change. Especially the frequency with which I get to see my daughter. Our "together times" will decrease. (Though hopefully they'll become even sweeter.) For me, once I left for college I never really "came home". Summer jobs kept me out of town for my first three years, and after the fourth year, I got married. I have a sneaky suspicion Elizabeth will follow a similar path. SO, for all practical purposes, August 3 may very well be the last time Elizabeth and I will ever serve in Sunday school together. And I don't know who should be the recipient of my condolences. Our girls, because they aren't going to get to play with Miss Elizabeth anymore, and won't be able to see this lovely teenager who cherishes each of them. Or me, because my little girl is leaving the nest. *sniff*
I just finished reading Karen Kingsbury's book, Between Sundays. And I loved it. ('Course, that's the way I've felt about almost every book of hers I have read.) Anyway, I just loved the story. BUT there was one time I thought I might have been able to do a better job than she did in writing the book. Because there was this time, rather early on, when two of the characters were talking and I was just waiting for one to ask a critical question of the other. If he had asked the question, information would have come out which most likely would have answered some pretty big questions and provided clarity - which would have allowed them to move forward in their relationship, and skip over a lot of pain. I mean, I was sure it would all work out in the end and ***spoiler alert*** it did. But I thought, C'mon, Karen. You're writing this story. You're in control of it. Why don't you just reveal the information NOW so they can get on with life??? Because waiting? Is not my favorite thing to do. And I didn't want the characters in this novel (whom I was growing to love) to go through unnecessary trials. It just seemed so reasonable to me to let them know all the information and move along.
And that, my dear friends, is why I don't write novels. Besides the fact that I would have really short books, I fear I would also have really shallow characters. Because as the story went along in Between Sundays, the characters grew in beautiful ways. Karen Kingsbury used their pain and struggles to get them to evaluate themselves. They faced their pasts with honesty, and allowed God to use the bad for good. They learned what it meant to trust their Creator. They learned about humbling themselves. And by the end of the story they had become absolutely beautiful characters. They loved purely and honestly. They looked beyond the outward appearance. They truly wanted what was best for one another. And I was so excited for their future. I knew it would be glorious. Because of who they had become through their trials. And that is when I discovered my reading of this novel was a great big object lesson God was using to speak to me. Just like Karen Kingsbury was writing Between Sundays, and she was in control and knew how things would turn out - so God is writing my (& your) story. He is in control. Completely. He knows how everything is going to end. He knows all the information, but He doesn't reveal it all up front. Rather, God allows us to go through times of pain and struggle - and He uses those experiences to shape and grow us. To make us into the people He wants us to be. And even though I am not a fan of waiting, I can trust that it's all going work out in the end. Ahhhh. That understanding makes me feel a little more peaceful. How about you?
Last Thursday, Matthew had a job to do. Brian had asked him to wash the screens to the windows, and had them leaning up against the house. Just waiting for Matthew to get to them.
I had reminded Matthew a time, or two, that the screens were waiting. And, finally, I came out and asked, "So, Matthew. When are you planning to take care of your chores?" **Honest moment: Matthew was using my computer, and I wanted to use it. I thought my more direct question would motivate him to get to work - which would allow me access to my computer. Confession finished.
So, anyway, Matthew hopped up to wash the screens. And I sat down to play work.
Except, I found myself spending more time staring out the window at my boy than looking at the computer screen and getting things done. Because he was working so diligently. And he was being careful to do a good job. And I just stared at my son and realized how much he's growing up. I was proud of the hard work he was doing. I was somewhat surprised that I was sitting and observing, rather than constantly reminding him to stay on task. I was noticing that my little boy has really become a young man.
I sat in my chair, staring out the window, just watchin' my son. Loving every minute of it.
Just make the call.
Are you super busy? So much to do, and not enough time to get it all done? Oh, I can so relate! With the many roles we play and the various people who need us for this, that, and the other thing, being super busy can simply become a way of life. (And may be cause for us to re-evaluate what we're doing, and questioning the necessity of those activities. But that is another post for another day.) Anyway, I understand being busy. But this week, I saw busy in another light. And I didn't like it. I was visiting with one of my favorite ladies at Edgewood, and she told me she'd just had a really bad night. She said she wasn't sure she was going to make it through. As in, she was kind of expecting to die that night. And the thing is, she said, no one would have known about it until noon the next day when someone from the kitchen brought her lunch to her apartment. She was expecting a call from her daughter that morning, but the call never came. So no one would have missed her. Because her daughter didn't call. This dear woman went on to explain that her daughter is very busy. She's having some work done on her house and is expecting visitors. And she is involved in this and that activity. She is very busy. So it's understandable that she didn't call. But she was supposed to call.M was expecting her call.But the call didn't come.Her daughter is a very busy person, after all.And that's what I kept hearing. M had so hoped her daughter would call, but she didn't. Because she's busy. And even though she didn't say it in so many words, I know M was very saddened by the missing phone calls.As are so many other men and women I know at Edgewood. Sad, because someone is too busy to visit - or at least call. Reflecting on that conversation was rather convicting for me. I thought of the many times I have considered calling someone to check in on them, or stopping in for a quick visit - even if just to say, "Hi!" But then I have gotten involved in another activity and time got away from me, and I never made that connection. Because I was "too busy". I'm so sorry! Are you "with me" in that conviction? Know what? I bet your phone is real close to you right now. Maybe even in your hand? If your heart is feeling convicted, too, if there is someone whose day would be brightened by simply hearing your voice, do us all a favor. Just make the call.
Disclaimer: The ideas and opinions expressed in this post are my own, and may not necessarily reflect those of Vista Springs Living Centers.
The LORD detests men of perverse heart, but he delights in those whose ways are blameless.Proverbs 11:20 A good man obtains favor from the LORD, but the LORD condemns a crafty man. Proverbs 12:2 The LORD detests lying lips, but he delights in men who are truthful.Proverbs 12:22 He who fears the LORD has a secure fortress, and for his children it will be a refuge.Proverbs 14:26 The LORD detests the sacrifice of the wicked, but the prayer of the upright pleases him.Proverbs 15:8 The LORD detests the way of the wicked, but he loves those who pursue righteousness.Proverbs 15:9 The LORD is far from the wicked, but he hears the prayer of the righteous.Proverbs 15:29 The crucible for silver and the furnace for gold, but the LORD tests the heart.Proverbs 17:3 All a man's ways seem right to him, but the LORD weighs the heart.Proverbs 21:2As I have been reading the book of Proverbs - besides thinking a lot about my words and seeking wisdom - I have been overwhelmed with a desire to be the woman God has created me to be. I read these verses about what the LORD loves, and what He detests; about what delights Him, and what He condemns, and I just want to live a life which pleases Him. And those last two verses have really gotten me, too. Being who He wants me to be isn't about what I'm doing on the outside. He knows my heart - and it all has to be right there. So I pray, LORD, change me. Make me into the woman You want me to be. Please work in me that which is pleasing to You today. How does God speak to you through these words from Proverbs?
Er, no it isn't. That's my husband and daughter!
That's what I was thinking last Thursday as I stared up into the sky and saw two little dots. Something was definitely falling from the sky. Just moments before, I had seen the airplane in which my husband and daughter were flying. And now there were those two little dots, getting bigger and bigger. Finally, there was a burst of "big-ness" and that's when I started breathing normally again. Because that is the moment I knew the parachutes had opened, and two of my greatest loves were going to live to see another day. The crazy thing is, all this drama was intentional. That is, my husband and daughter jumped out of a perfectly good airplane - on purpose. In other words, they went skydiving. The adventure for Elizabeth was a graduation gift from her aunt and uncle, and she has been looking forward to it for years. Brian jumped, too, because he couldn't bear the thought of not getting in on the fun. And I? Was given the option to jump, but I couldn't imagine myself
Just because something has always been done "this way" doesn't mean you always have to do it "that way".
Seriously. I do not understand why some things take me so long to learn. Check that. What I really do not understand is why I cannot think of some things on my own. As in, why do I make some things so complicated when the solution appears to other people rather quickly? It's like I'm stuck in this certain way of doing things, and I can't see out. Like I'm blind to the possibilities. Er, my eyes were giving me trouble a couple nights ago when I was trying to read small print. Maybe I really am going blind... Ahhhh, I digress. The truth is, I am super excited about a women's group we're going to begin next month at Edgewood. We're going to watch and discuss Forever in Love with Jesus, and I am simply delighted as I think about what a beautiful experience this is going to be. So much so, that I was contemplating going in on my day off to lead the study. Because Monday, Wednesday, and Friday mornings won't work; we have exercise class. And Tuesday is not a possibility; that's when we have our regular Bible study. So, the only other option I could conceive of was Thursday morning. I wasn't crazy about the idea, but I just couldn't see how we could make it happen any other way without ruining what already works. So this week as Shelly and I were creating the August calendar I shared my dilemma with her, and she got this kind of Really? You think that's the only solution? look on her face. And I'm all, Yeah. We can't change anything. We've always done things the way we're doing them now. And then Shelly said this really crazy, out-of-the-box thing. She said, "Why don't we schedule it Friday at 9am? And move exercise back to 10:30, instead of 10:00?" And I'm all, "That is such a good idea. You're brilliant!" We talked more about the good things this time change will bring to our Friday routines. And I was so, so pleased with the solution Shelly had proposed. (Besides the fact that my Thursdays will remain "mine".) Actually, it is a little embarrassing to admit that I was so stuck in the box. But now that I've been set free I am happy to share the good lesson with you. *smile* Just because something has always been done "this way" doesn't mean you always have to do it "that way". Are you stuck in any boxes today?
Disclaimer: The ideas and opinions expressed in this post are my own, and may not necessarily reflect those of Vista Springs Living Centers.
My kids have regular chores around the house. Even during the summer. And even after they've been at camp for a week and are sooooooo out of practice. *wink*
So, Tuesday morning when I walked into the kitchen and realized Matthew hadn't taken the trash and recycling to the curb Monday night, I knew what I had to do. I went to his bedroom and opened the door. Seeing him snuggled up cozily in his bed, I walked over and touched him gently. Then I said, "Hey, mister. You didn't take out the trash and recycling last night. You need to get up right now and take care of that, before they come to get it." Matthew groaned. I took hold of his blankets and pulled them off of his tired little body and said, "Come on!" And I left his room. Moments later, Matthew was plodding through the kitchen - eyes still half shut - and he managed to get out of his mouth, "Will someone help me?" When I answered with a 'no', he said very clearly, "This is stupid!" and he slammed the door on the way out to the garage. Ahhhh, silly kid! I didn't see anything "stupid" about it at all. In fact, I thought it was pretty smart of me to get him out of bed to do the chore he was supposed to do before he got in to bed. Otherwise, in the future he might think he can skip his chores and just know that I'll take care of them. Not.gonna.happen. Naaahhhh, that wasn't stupid at all. The way I see it, I was helping him get smarter. Remember to plan ahead. Take responsibility. Do the right thing. All that jazz. Besides, he got to go right back to bed. *grin*
Last week the sermon at church was all about our words.
A few days ago someone asked me, The peace that comes over you hearing a graceful melody - is that how you are heard? And every day since the beginning of the month, I have been reading a chapter of Proverbs. Words - what I say, how I say it, and the way in which it's heard - have been heavy on my mind. Because I am becoming more and more aware just how powerful our words are. To build up, or to tear down. To read the rest, please visit me today at i am servant.
So, we're in the airport in Cancun, going through security on our way home. And Elizabeth gets "flagged" for a random search.
I know it had to be a random search, because, really. If you looked at my sweet daughter, there is no way you would think she's a terrorist. First of all, she was carrying a bright pink back pack. And the back pack had two key chains on it. One was a cute little squirrel in a sleeping bag. The other simply said, "Trust." Not very threatening so far. The security officer unzipped the back pack, reached in, and produced two stuffed animals. Still not threatening. Then he reached in and pulled out a rectangular box-y object which was covered in flower-y material and lace. I could see him asking Elizabeth to explain the item. And I wanted to call out, "Careful! It's sharper than a double-edged sword!" (The item in question was her Bible.) The officer unzipped the cover and flipped through it a bit. At that point, I suppose it could have been threatening. In a good way. When he was convinced the Bible could pass through security, the officer gave a general pat-down over the rest of the back pack. And got very excited when he felt something suspicious at the bottom. He rather frantically searched through the remaining pockets until he located the offending item. Reaching deep into the back pack, he grabbed it and triumphantly removed a... ...bright purple (empty) water bottle. I'm not sure if he was shaking his head as he returned the bottle to its location, or if it just looked that way because I was laughing. Either way, the security officer determined that my daughter and her belongings posed no threat to the airline, and she was allowed to proceed. I could have told that man my girl is not dangerous. The kind of girl who carries a pink bag and a purple water bottle, stuffed animals and a Bible? Her heart is more beautiful than her outsides, and her outsides are lovely. She isn't going to harm anyone. She's no terrorist. BUT, armed with her Sword and empowered by the Spirit, I am praying she'll be a mighty warrior in her Father's army.
Love makes it all better.
Many of the men and women with whom I interact at Edgewood aren't "who they used to be". Oh, how often I hear them utter things like, "I used to be able to walk that fast," and, "My memory isn't as good as it once was," and, "I can't see as well anymore," and,"I'm just kind of falling apart." Mind, body, and otherwise, many of the folks at Edgewood are experiencing the toll time takes on a person. And it can be a pretty frustrating transition. Aging, that is. There is one woman, S, who is particularly struggling with her mind/memory. And it makes her sad. This week when she came into exercise class one day she said to me, "I need to whisper something to you." So I got close to her and she said, "I don't like it when I come into a room and people treat me like an invalid." Note: This lovely woman really does need special treatment. As in, specific instruction. When she walks into a room you need to tell her to sit down, and exactly where to do it. When the elevator door opens up, she needs to be told to walk into it. To get her to turn around, it is often necessary to take hold of her walker and physically turn her. Something just isn't connecting in her brain, so she needs those specifics. But, apparently, that makes her feel like an invalid. I put my arm around her and whispered back, "S, you aren't an invalid. I love you!" And we got started with exercise class. When we were finished exercising, I walked around and greeted each person, thanking them for coming to class that day. And when I got to S, I reminded her she could get up from her chair, I helped her get situated with her walker, then I kissed her on the cheek and said, "I love you!" And from the smile on her face, I could tell - she wasn't feeling like an invalid in that moment.Sometimes even the smallest expression of love can change a person's outlook. Is there someone who needs to know you love them today? Love makes it all better.
Disclaimer: The ideas and opinions expressed in this post are my own, and may not necessarily reflect those of Vista Springs Living Centers.
I told you once that my household and our various "issues" make us resemble the alphabet. And I mentioned recently that Brian had a great idea to have the kids make dinner once a week this summer. Well, when you put those two items together? Let me tell you: I'm not sure the alphabet and dinner preparation are a healthy combination. *ahem*
This recovering perfectionist mother with GAD, supervising/teaching her ADHD w/significant OCD tendencies son could have resulted in the need for a CPS intervention. I'm just sayin'. Picture this: *I'm in the kitchen to provide support and guidance to Matthew as he prepares dinner. *The preparation is supposed to be his job, so I am trying to be as hands-off as possible. And being hands-off is not in my I'm-trying-to-recover-from-being-a-perfectionist-nature. That, in itself, is anxiety-producing to me. *Matthew is doing a fair job with his work, but soon gets off task and needs to be reminded to make dinner. *I demonstrate slicing and removing fat from the meat. And quickly regret it, as Matthew becomes focused on cutting out every.single.molecule.of.fat. *So I call him back to the task at hand: getting dinner prepared and on the table, even with a few little tiny pieces of fat left in it. *As he is slicing an onion, his OCD kicks in again, and Matthew appears to be intent on picking off every.single.little.piece.of.root. *I take a deep breath and tell him to just cut off the end of the onion with the knife. *With the slicing done, the meat goes into the pan and Matthew meticulously turns each piece to make sure it cooks evenly. *On to mixing the sauce ingredients. It takes a while, because Matthew gets distracted playing in the water when I tell him to wash out a bowl. *As each sauce ingredient is added to the bowl, Matthew wants to remove labels, rinse cans, and put them out into the recycling bin. I note his
My church is currently reading through the book of Proverbs. One chapter each day in the month of July. And the weekend sermons are focusing on what we have read over the previous week. It's a good thing.
I have read the book of Proverbs many times before, and I have several favorite verses which come from these words of wisdom. But this time as I am reading through (Granted I've only covered eight chapters to date.) I find myself caught up with one thought: It makes so much sense to seek wisdom. I mean, seriously! These chapters have laid out warnings against rejecting wisdom, and countless benefits of following it. We're warned about being fools, and assured that we will be protected and life will be good if we seek wisdom. Goodness, we're even promised that if we seek wisdom - we'll find it! (8:17) So, I'm reading these proverbs and learning more about wisdom. Chapter 8 tells us wisdom is true and not wicked (v.7), it is just and not perverse (v.8), it is more precious than rubies (v.11), it possesses counsel and sound judgement (v.14), it was brought forth by God as the first of His works (v.22), and participated with Him in all creation (v.30). 1 Corinthians 1:30 tells us Jesus, Himself, is wisdom. So I read all these things, and I think, It makes so much sense to seek wisdom. And then I wonder, Why do I ever doubt God? Why do I ever think my own way is better? More wise? Why??? OK. I know the reason why. It's the constant battle between my redeemed spirit, and my sinful nature. That battle will continue until the day I leave this earth, and go Home to where I really belong. But one thing this study of Proverbs has clearly motivated me to do is this: To keep on seeking Him, and to keep feeding my spirit the Truth of His Word. Because, when you take time to look at it, It makes so much sense to seek wisdom. It's just so...Reasonable! With what are you feeding your spirit today?
So, when we were in Mexico the kids enjoyed spending their evenings at the teen "night club". They met a few other kids who were also staying at the resort and they all had fun together. And I was cool with that. But on about our fourth night, at roughly 1:00 in the morning, I woke up to discover that the boys weren't back yet. I wasn't sure I should be worried, but it was so late. (!) And they hadn't been out this late before.And our cell phones didn't work in Mexico. (OK, they would work, be we are entirely too cheap to pay the exorbitant fees.) So we couldn't just call them to inquire of their whereabouts, or whenabouts (You know, 'When about are you fixin' to get back here?'), or any other abouts. Therefore, panic was the only reasonable response I could muster up. Only, I was way too tired to put realistic energy into my panic mode. So I woke up Brian and told him the situation. And asked him to go out looking for them. (I was tired, remember? I felt bad for asking Brian to go out, but I just didn't have the energy to get out of bed, myself. And I couldn't call myself a mother if I just went back to sleep knowing my boys were out there somewhere, probably getting attacked, or something. So, I did the best I could. I sent someone else! And I tried to stay awake while I prayed for them all. *wink*) And every now and then, I also sensed some anger rising in me. What were those boys thinking by staying out so late? Didn't they have any sense of respect for their dear mother who was struggling to stay awake while they were probably getting torn to shreds by some crazy tropical-ish animal? They could have at least called the room!
In the end, the boys came back on their own. (Read that: Before the resort security team found them and TOLD them to come back.) They weren't getting attacked, torn to shreds, or even causing trouble. They'd simply gone with their new friends to walk along the beach and wandered a bit further than they had realized. Since Brian and I had been asleep every other night when they'd gotten back from the teen-thing, they figured we didn't really care what time they turned in. And calling never crossed their minds, as they weren't aware they could use any ole phone in the resort to call us. At first, I wasn't willing to accept their excuses as valid. I was a worried momma, and I wanted them to pay.(!) Until God's Spirit allowed me to remember a time when I was a senior in high school - out late with friends. We weren't getting into trouble. We were just having something to eat at Denny's and totally lost track of time. I didn't know my mom was at home, worried sick about me. I had no idea she had sent my dad out driving around, because she was just sure I was in a ditch somewhere. Calling to let them know where I was at such a late hour never crossed my mind. I mean, I knew I was fine - so what's to worry? And that's when I got it. A little feeling of deja vu. I had a sudden and instant wave of understanding for my boys, and all was forgiven. BUT, we were very clear the next night about expectations and responsibilities. *smile*
I have so much growing to do.
And as if I needed further proof of that truth, I just got it by the fact that typing it out was such a chore. *ahem* When I returned from vacation, I came back to work to a new supervisor. That is, we now have our FULL TIME Life Engagement Director in place at Edgewood. I am continuing on in my part-time roll, and that makes her my supervisor. And, as you may recall from a previous post, I am very happy to have her on staff. The demands of my job are way too much for a 24-hour/week position. Together, she and I are going to be able to bring a much better program. I have known these benefits in my head for a very long time. But when we began putting together some plans this week, I discovered my heart still has a way to go. That is, we are coming up with some really cool ideas and I love the plans we're making. I'm excited for August when we're going to unveil our first month of "together" plans. BUT, as Shelly and I were brainstorming and building off one another, I began to sink back to my feelings of inadequacy. Thoughts like this were going through my head: But I did a good job, didn't I? I planned cool stuff, didn't I? Or, maybe not. These activities we're planning are awesome. Why didn't I ever come up with something like this on my own? Why couldn't I be as good as her? I'm such a loser. And, to be honest, I felt like I was on the verge of tears much of the time. Thankfully, God caught me as I was falling. He reminded me of the Truth I learned before. And He reassured me, it's still True today. The thing is, it really frustrates me to ride this roller-coaster of ups and downs, feeling good and struggling with depressive episodes. I just want to be steady. But I'm not. I'm still learning. Still growing. Still in need of a Savior. And, ya know? The more I think about it, the more I understand this is the best place for me to be. Constantly needing and receiving the grace of my Father. I have so much growing to do. And that's a very good thing.
Disclaimer: The ideas and opinions expressed in this post are my own, and may not necessarily reflect those of Vista Springs Living Centers.
During our flight from Chicago to Cancun I had the joy of sitting next to a little boy, about 4 years old, and his mother. My young neighbor was quiet and content for most of the flight - enjoying a portable video game. But as we began our descent to Cancun, he began to speak up. Because he was having ear problems. And when I say ear problems, I mean 4-year-old-sized ear problems. You know? The kind you don't really understand, so you blow them out of proportion and think the world is coming to an end. This poor little guy was miserable. In spite of his mother's efforts to comfort him - with sips of pop, and gum, and rubbing his ears and back - nothing seemed to help. In fact, he got to the point of crying out, "I can't take it anymore!" And he said to his mother, "I don't like this place," (referring to our destination). "I wish we weren't even taking this trip." And there - in the midst of my sympathetic yearnings to take away this little guy's ear pain - God gave me a glimpse of how He sees our heart pain.
I thought about my young friend's words of disdain toward Mexico. Considered the irony of his dislike for such a beautiful place where he was likely to have so much fun. And I realized he couldn't even comprehend the delights which awaited him on the other side of the airport. His little ears were hurting, and - for the moment - that pain was the only thing which seemed real to him. Mom's love and comforting touch, attempts to get his ears to 'pop', words of encouragement - none of it was a help to this great big 4-year-old-sized problem. Oh, how I wanted to be able to be able to explain to my young friend how wonderful his vacation in Mexico was going to be. How I wanted to assure him that when we landed his ears would feel better, he'd quickly get over the discomfort, and once he got into the fun of it all - he'd likely forget that his ears had ever been in pain. I'd been to Mexico before. I knew some of the wonders in store for him. My experience granted me the knowledge that this moment of ear pain was only temporary, and the joy would far out-weigh it. But in that moment, all my 4-year-old friend knew was that his ears hurt. A lot. Aren't we much the same way when our hearts are hurting? Our pain may be from a bad decision we made. It may be coming from a difficult circumstance we're facing. Perhaps the pain is from a broken relationship, or promise. Maybe our heart is aching from watching someone we love go through their own painful situation. Or, maybe we don't even understand the source of our sorrow - and that confusion only increases our pain. And there sits our God, loving us and offering comforting words, encouraging us to persevere. HE sees us in our pain and HE cares. Yet we remain focused on our pain. Concerned that we can't take it anymore, and afraid it will never end. Remember, friend, our God also sees what lies ahead of us. HE knows the joy we'll experience on the other side of the pain. HE's been there. HE's there right now. And we can trust HIM. Are you experiencing a 4-year-old-sized problem today? I pray God will help you trust Him in the midst of it.
In this world of cyber-space, high-tech gadgets, and virtual relationships, I have come to know the blessing of real love, and real friendship. Even with some people I've only met in real life one time. Such is the case with Leah Adams. We've been blogging buddies for I-don't-even-know-how-many-years. We've shared joys and frustrations. We've encouraged each other. We actually had the opportunity to spend a weekend together in 2010. And in many ways, I view Leah as my big sister. She has a heart completely devoted to God, and I know I can trust her judgement and counsel. So, when Leah was building a team to promote her newest Bible study, I was eager to jump on board with my support. Now, without further ado, allow me to introduce to you: my friend, Leah Adams, and her book, HeBrews: A Better Blend.
Never a rain drop.
Only one over-cast morning. (And it cleared up nicely.) Perfectly warm temperatures. Wonderful company. (The entire Hossink clan!) Beautiful accommodations. Fun adventures. Charming wildlife. And I never had to cook a thing! What could be better? *smile* We had a fabulous time in Mexico last week. Specifically in Riviera Maya. And here, for your
